apologies for incorrect word manufacturage, professor. I figured a post by someone who couldn't figure out what to do with a dead phone might have been a place where it'd be possible to get away with less than dissertation-level language usage. also, don't actually put it in a microwave. it could asplode.

compare how long it takes for each old smartphone to asplode. hilarity ensues. maybe do it outside. and stand behind a lead wall.