You want to grope me? Knock yourself out. Just be prepared for some colour commentary on my part ("Ooooh yeeaah. Cup those balls!", "How much for a happy ending?", etc.). It makes my regular business travel that much more entertaining.
However, you do not touch my children. Ever.
We recently had to go on a family vacation, and were randomly selected for an enhanced security screening. The agents wanted to pat down our two children, and we flat out refused. They insisted, and the TSA agents' delivery tone was the standard issue "You are going to do as we say, Citizen" intonation that law enforcement officers are coached in, but I'm immune to it after having had spent my early life in the military.
I slowly, clearly and forcefully replied, "Listen very carefully. If you lay a hand on any one of my children, I will have you arrested for sexually assaulting a minor. Do not touch them. You do not have our permission."
One scoffed: "Sir, we have to subject them to a pat down."
"Wrong. Officer?" (waving to get the attention of a LEO that was posted in the screening area)
He walked over and matter-of-factly asked, "Sir? Is there a problem?"
"If either of these people touch my children, in any way, I will officially press charges of assault, sexual touching of a minor, and anything else that is applicable."
He genuinely perked up at this point. (He must secretly hate the TSA as much as the rest of us), "Understood, Sir." Turning to them he said, "He's not joking. I'm not joking. Don't touch their children. If you need to see what's under their clothes, the parent will disrobe them in a private screening area removed from public view. Clear?"
The TSA agents were far more cooperative and humbled after that, for some reason. We were waved through after the parents were given a good one over, along with everything else we were toting through. But they didn't touch the kids, or ask to see them disrobed.