After a several year hiatus away from computer stuff I agree completely. I gradated CS in 2002. There was much more priority given to imperative programming and arrays for everything than there should have been. Most of the lecturers were brainwashed by terms like "object oriented is the future", "extreme programming" and other such nonsense because it's "kewl". We did some Prolog but not nearly enough.
Of that list, maybe object oriented programming is important to "know". Otherwise computer science courses should be treated as language and platform agnostic, and only focus on stuff like data structures, arrays, etc. Basic theory that is applicable to any language.
It wasn't emphasized. We did no lisp! or Scheme.. It's sad that I'm more mature than many of those guys despite being younger.
I never did any LISP programming in school either. Oddly enough the language that always fascinated me was Postscript. Its amazing what a printer page description language is capable of.
Personally, I bought the Surface 2 (not pro) last Christmas, and I like it a lot more than my wife's iPad. The expandable storage, plus again, not having to buy apps for things that should be standard, like playing videos from a network share, make it a good choice. I also like the UI a lot better than iPad or Android, and like the fact that I can open a command prompt or run a powershell script if I want to. The lack of apps is probably the only downfall, but I find that I'm still able to do everything I want to do on a tablet. There are many games I can't play, but there's enough games to keep me entertained.
The lack of playing files from a network share out of the box is likely Apple ecosystem lock-in. They want you to use iCloud. Meanwhile every cheapo Android device usually has support for DLNA.
The Windows RT tablet's days are likely numbered with the crop of new Atom based Windows 8.1 tablets that are coming out. Being able to run off the shelf Win32 stuff helps their case. A full 8.1 tablet has no problems connecting to VPNs for example.
Suggest you just sit there and wait till life gets easier.