"Hey, you know what hasn't been super over-complicated yet? Interoffice communications. How can we further fuck this up?"
"Let's make a version of Slack, but integrate it with Skype even more!"
"Brilliant!"

NSA: Well, we can't get Snowden, but it would sure be swell if we could get SOMEONE.
Martin: *Waves* Hi! I'm still living in the States!
NSA: Yes, you'll do nicely.

You can break any law when your last name is Clinton. Unless you're Roger Clinton.

I suppose this is the FBI's way of ensuring their budget is increased after this election year.

Blame the OS? Nope. I'll blame the Operator, not the Operating System.

Don't forget the pure and undying hatred of the American people for anything "sciencey."

If you think that's bad, take a gander at Tumblr sometime.

I think it's just biding it's time as a new HK model droid...

I wish I could argue with this, but I cannot.

Mind you, this is the company that owns Tumblr. Logic has no place in their world.

"Moron says words and things that mean stuff and whatnot."
Or
"Advertisers hate things that prevent people from seeing advertisements."

I had no idea XBOX LIVE and /. were merging...

This pun hurt. Oh, but it hurt so good...

I'm still working on the whole "get military-grade weapons and troop transports banned from podunk towns" petition. I just don't have the energy to get riled by something else just yet.

Not gonna lie; the first thing that came to mind was the "Beware the Grey Ghost" episode of Batman: The Animated Series. And however many other times RC cars have been used to blow things up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

I'd imagine that if you're a felon, you'd have a fast-track in any MBA program.

I keed, I keed.

That said, I don't presume to know the laws, but I'd think you'd be better suited as part of a break-fix sort of shop. Never once in all my years was I ever asked about a criminal history or otherwise unsavory aspects of one's past. I have to support the suggestion of becoming a developer of some sort, since most of them are usually considered socially marginal, anyway.