It's been so long that I've forgotten how slashdot's Journals work. Maybe the layout and control buttons have been changed. If anybody is reading this, I was wondering how you 1) edit your own entry and 2) browse other people's Journals.
Recap: nearly 1 year ago, part of my hand was amputated following injuries sustained in an accident. The accident was with heroin. I accidentally injected myself in an artery. The damage was nearly instantaneous and I soon had gangrene in all 5 fingers. Up to the time of my surgery, I was freaking out and needed a quasi-anonymous place to vent. I've read slashdot for years so I thought I would take advantage of its Journal resource. I also wanted a private place to vent where my girlfriend (
i can't believe i'm going to have my fingers amputated on an outpatient basis. this is what i was told by the surgeon.
the pain is driving me crazy.
i have an appointment with a surgeon next monday. i guess he'll take it from there. my wound care doctor told me today that i'm going to need to get the show on the road. i'm scared.
i like that poem. it sounds like rumi or something.
HiLJ, please give us an update.
i can't believe i'm going to lose my hand. the doc said that if i had come in sooner, they might have been able to do more.
i have not yet lost my hand.
AC: THANKS for the suggestion! that rhye's and fall mod was not working was indeed a patch issue. after patching my cracked civ4 installation, i was able to get rhye's and fall to load, and i've been playing it. i've been listening to old skinny puppy tracks while i play.
GOD'S GIFT MAGGOT.
i have not yet lost my hand.
i had 6 pints at a bar on Haight earlier in the evening. this did nothing to help the pain but made me teary eyed concerning this whole ordeal. i am now at the end of the rope mentally, physically, and spiritually concerning my present pain level. thoughts of escaping through suicide run through my head with alarming frequency. i've been suicidal before over emotional pain, but the pain i now experience surpasses that by many orders of magnitude. i guess wha
hand hurts like a motherfscker.
thanks for the link for civ4 hacks. i downloaded the fake disk image, mounted it with alcohol120, ran safedisk4 and got it to work. unfortunately, i still can't get the rhye's and fall mod to work. maybe i need to patch up to the latest version of civ4? i will try this later.
I almost posted these samwell lyrics myself a few hours ago. i dont know what it is about hilj journal that makes me think about that video every time i read it.
i'm confused.
1st cup of coffee at 'bean there'. on my way in and out of the building, i've been trying to avoid the innkeeper. he has been getting nosy. every time he sees me he has this sinister knowing look. then he asks me how i'm doing and if there is anything he can do. how am i liking my accomadations... . i havent' told him about how my accident happened. but he has asked.he reminds me of uriah heep. he's tall and gangling with wispy red hair and lashless eyelids. he moves oddly [jerking and awkwar
my pain level is off the chart tonight. shooting nerve pain is difficult to bear. it's hard to concentrate on anything except finding a way to escape.
i wish i had a woman in my life right now. but it was a woman that made me seek refuge from emotional pain in the first place. i say "made me" which is denial. i just cope poorly. she didn't put the needle in my arm. only i am responsible for that.
the tag/date/accnt is from the doc.
david brunner's "the sheep look up" is good too. written in the 1970s, it was prophetic and applies to current times. 'prezzy' = 'w', birth defects - autism spike in the news today, ecological disastesr
forget the drek like jordan and all the other lotr knockoff writers spew. Your syllabus should include some one from among the earliest classics. i recommend 'frankenstein.' deals with social technological issues. heinlein's stranger in a strange land is a good classic too. of all his 1000 or so books he wrote that i read, this was the only 1 worth reading. maybe throw in kindred by octavia butler. 1 of the few african american feminist scifi authors. explores slavery, racism, etc. you will need a good cyberpunk title too. i suggest sting by gibson.
1st coffee at cole valley cafe.
pics of my hand. the middle pic is the fasciotomy. i warn you that the image is gruesome.
[IMG]http://img101.photolava.com/2009/10/05/arm_and_hand-snk0etvq.png[/IMG]
there.
THEGODDESSOFTHENETHASTWISTINGFINGERSANDHERVOICEISLIKEAJAVELININTHENIGHTDUDE
