Um, a vibrator isn't a fake dick. You are thinking of a dildo. Although a vibrator may also be a dildo, not all dildos are vibrators. A vibrator is something that ...vibrates. it can be any shape.

Um...does this post make me a sex toy nazi?

"All software sucks. All hardware sucks."

"Some software and hardware suck more than others."

Hey, we're birthday-brothers. I turned 22 on 999.

Um, less I get modded troll, the joke is that the line

Only at the point that the water is has done so for the greater good of the lake.

Sounds like a line from TimeCube, even though it was probably just Wordplay (appropriate nick) typing too fast.

That is because you reject the 4-Corner time-cube!

YOU can't handle Cubic Time, Cubic Life
or Cubic Truth - for insideof Time Cube
equates the most magnificient symmetry
of opposites existing within the universe -
for every corner has an equal opposite corner,
every 2 corners has an equal opposite 2
  corners, every tri-corner has an equal
opposite tri-corner and every 4 corners has
an equal opposite 4 corners. No human or
  god can utter such powerful ineffable
opposite Cubic Truth.

Pattern of sounds with a meaning, last I checked, that was the definition of a word (although, it might have changed...).

so you can call me an idiot if you like, but at least I know you won't refer to me as a ginormous idiot.

+1 Hilarious But True.

Troll? Yes.
But - There is a certain poetic rhythm to the post.

When ladies become bored they begin talking.
It's babylonian. It does not even matter what they talk about.
When ladies become bored they begin talking.

It's sad when a potential artist turns to the dark side.

Being non-happy is treason. Treason is punishable by summary execution.

That would make him an exception, assuming the person who is writing the horoscopes knows his/her business, they should apply to about 95% of the population.

No, anyone who hasn't had contact with DnD (Dungeons and Dragons) wouldn't know what the heck I am talking about.

PHB - Player's Handbook: The guide that every DnD player shouldn't be without, tells you how to create a character and level up, along with equipment and spell lists and anything else you need to play.
MM - Monster Manual: A listing of creatures (mostly evil 'Monsters') that may be encountered in the DnD universe, along with stats for each. A vital reference for DMs (Dungeon Masters).
DMG - Dungeon Master's Guide: The guide that every DnD DM shouldn't be without, tells you how to set up an adventure, how to create NPCs (Non-Player Characters, anyone not controlled by a player), how to run an adventure, and generally be the referee for the players.

If you are still curious after all that, try the wikipedia page on DnD, or, better yet, look up a group that plays in your area and give it a try. (just ask around any geek friends you have, someone knows someone who plays, trust me)

Oh, and OMFG is general AOL-speak for Oh My Fucking God, which I put in to be humorous both because of the fact that we are talking about God, and because of all the other Acronyms in the post. (Surgeon General's Warning - The use of AOL-speak in any situation where it is not used for humor may be hazardous to your intelligence. Please type responsibly.)

Shutup nerd.

Except, if I was actually a Jock, I wouldn't have recognized the reference.

When you make a reference to 'geek cannon' you are actually broadcasting to anyone in your group that you are, in fact, a member of that group and are seeking solidarity with other members of that group.

By acknowledging that I recognize that reference, I am saying "Here I am, I am a part of your group." So this is all just reinforcing the us-vs-them thinking that the GP was talking about. (Notice how I use GP instead of saying grandparent post, or, heaven forbid, 'the post two posts up', this is another way of identifying myself as a part of a group, namely, the group of people who are knowledgeable about local slang. It's insidious, isn't it?)

...at the darkness. And says "Let there be light."

OMFG guys! The bible is actually a PHB! Obviously Adam wrote the MM when he named all the animals, so that only leaves the DMG, which is obviously metaphorically referred to as "the tree of knowledge of good and evil."
Adam and Eve weren't kicked out of the garden for eating fruit! they were kicked out because they were peeking at the DM's notes!

90% of the problem is the conception that a barbie doll is a perfect 10. What you call a 6.8-7 (where did you get such precise numbers?) I would say is perfectly beautiful, variety is the spice of life!

Why do most of the people I know, men and women, think that there is one perfect body-type for each gender, and if you don't make the cut, better luck in another life.

It's sickening to see young girls striving for some media-inspired sense of beauty, and feeling like they will never be able to live up to the perfection that is expected of them when they would be much better off just accepting who they are being confident in their bodies.