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+ - END FOX News: The answer. The solution.-> 4

Submitted by Web Goddess
Web Goddess (133348) writes "FOX NEWS. The answer. The solution.
I was born without muscles to open my eyes! Blepharophimosis ptosis is extremely rare. "Full medical treatment" = a muscle graft that allows the forehead to elevate the eyelids. To blink, the eyelids just drift downwards, not fully shut. So my eyes learned to automatically roll upwards, each time I blink and when I sleep.

Eyelid movement is so important that, all my life, my body has (wow!) been re-purposing the lower facial muscles, neck muscles, even part of the tongue and lungs, to open and close the eyelids. TRUE STORY! Today I can squint, and move my eyelids a remarkable amount! When did this happen?! It is not documented. I believe I am revealing, for the first time ever, the true story of Blepharophimosis ptosis.

NOBODY NOTICES. Not consciously. But my expressions are often backwards, or complicated, or unusual. This is like having a speech impediment that someone stops noticing in five minutes, or a few weeks. But it is different. My expressions can only be properly mapped in a one-on-one conversation, where the observer's expressions learn what my matching expressions look like. (*) On film, my expressions appear to be a spectacle of facial grimaces when viewed by a stranger.

CUT TO THE CHASE:

My expressions and microexpressions (especially the ones involving blinks which include involuntary eye rolls) have caused the following lifelong problems:

* A single innocent glance can immediately turn a stranger or even a friend into a person with a permanent blood feud against me, who will NOT listen to reason, invents evidence to support the hatred, and transmits the senseless hate to others. "You sniffed my boyfriend's crotch!" Invented memes become gospel.

* I am completely unable to convey sincerity. Those muscles just don't...exist. Therefore, authority (police, teachers, parents, anyone with a skeptical opinion) never,ever,ever believe me. The mismatch between my words and my subliminally-perceived aspect inevitably lead to escalating suspicion and anger. Even when I am reporting serious crime, or serious personal abuse, the police begin to interrogate ME and things go downhill rapidly. My complaints about this abuse, frustratingly, evoke laughter in my friends, time and time again.

I see in FOX news, er, similar symptoms:

* Dittoheads are furious about insane things that fly in the face of reason, and infect others by the strength of their convictions.

* Commentators say the most outrageous things with seeming sincerity.

Yes, I am contacting facial expression analysis experts, Good Lord, I need a medical note to prevent a routine traffic stop from turning into an absolute nightmare. But do we have time for all that?

YOU are the solution. Microexpressions? Blepharophmosis ptosis people know that a single microexpression can induce permanent, infectious feud over nothing. Find the answer. The evidence is out there.

If you wish to analyze my facial expressions (how embarrassing I apparently look pretty odd, at times) you can contact me, or check out this video, where I was trying to carefully control my expressions for a large audience.

(especially camera angle beginning around 35 minutes in.)
http://fora.tv/2009/03/10/The_Darwin_Awards_Wendy_Northcutt

Thanks for your help! I am 47 years old. A lifetime of sad encounters, culminating in a miracle. The dittohead microexpression that induces hate? It's in my loving face."

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END FOX News: The answer. The solution.

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  • PS My face is a beneficial evolutionary advantage: My expressions are far more bizarre than any cultural differences, yet people, one on one, can easily understand it. I can communicate with anyone - stroke victims, autistic people, speech impediments, language-strangers, etc. Each person with Blepharophmosis ptosis makes a unique muscle arrangement; how cool would it be if our future evolution allowed us each to have our own unique expression set?!! Awesome.

  • Please remove my "vexillate.livejournal.com" link from any posted story. Also:

    "The U.S. military developed the technology to marry microexpression-recognition software with state-of-the-art systems capable of making instant interpretations."

    My birth defect - blepharophimosis ptosis - makes microexpression analysis exceedingly dangerous to me, particularly since I appear guilty to anyone who "looks" for guilt in my face. Microexpression analysis of crowds is dangerous to me.

    • Please add back in my "vexillate.livejournal.com" link and do not edit a single word of this story, if I may be so bold as to request.

      And dude, kindly, can you stop making me preview each and every post? In that noxious window you've invented? I read my post, I know what I'm doing, and if I hit the "submit" button too soon, what;s the harm.

      If I were goddess, anyway, that's what I'd ask for.

  • We can know the universe by judging actions. Is a person kind? Does a policy produce desirable results? What actually happened? This sort of knowledge equips minds to be better at predicting how reality will be in the future. Alternatively, we can ignore the universe of actions and seek knowledge in the superficial. Did a person smile at me just the way I like? Does a policymaker say the word "victory" with sufficient frequency? What irrational sentiments do events instill in me? This approach to s

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