Ballmer To Retire 633
Today Microsoft announced that CEO Steve Ballmer will be retiring within the next 12 months. He said, "There is never a perfect time for this type of transition, but now is the right time. ... My original thoughts on timing would have had my retirement happen in the middle of our company’s transformation to a devices and services company. We need a CEO who will be here longer term for this new direction." Ballmer, 57, has been Microsoft's CEO since taking over the role from Bill Gates in January, 2000. The company's board of directors has formed a committee to find a replacement for Ballmer, and he will continue his duties until a new CEO is found. Questions about Ballmer's fitness to remain CEO have been circulating for the past several years, particularly after the company struggled to get a foothold in the mobile market. It will be interesting to see how this affects Microsoft's stock price. Upon retirement, Ballmer will be able to cash out hundreds of millions of dollars worth of Microsoft stock.
In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
He can't even retire properly, should have done so years ago.
Chairs just won't fly around the same without him
Good news for stockholders (Score:5, Funny)
...in response, Microsoft's stock jumps up 10%
Ballmer leaving. (Score:4, Funny)
I'm so happy I could throw a chair!
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
CNN breaking news headline (Score:5, Funny)
"Microsoft says CEO Steve Ballmer will retire within 12 months. No successor named. Stock surges."
Captcha: finally
Still funny as hell (Score:5, Funny)
I love how he can state something as truth at the beginning of a sentence and then make a fool of himself by the end of it.
Re:Ballmer leaving. (Score:5, Funny)
Is that you Steven Sinofsky?
Nobel Prize as CEO (Score:5, Funny)
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Good news for stockholders (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Good news for stockholders (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Good news for stockholders (Score:5, Funny)
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
12 months left on his Windows Phone contract ... (Score:5, Funny)
He needs 12 months because his retirement is behind schedule. And of course, just days after his retirement, he will have to download all the new retirement patches and Retirement Service Pack 2.0.
No. He has 12 months left on his Windows Phone contract. Days after retirement he will get an iPhone 5S.
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
He can't even retire properly, should have done so years ago.
Chairs just won't fly around the same without him
Hope they tell him not to let the chair hit him on the way out.
Comment removed (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Disagree (Score:5, Funny)
Even half a Jobs would turn Microsoft around from the stagnating business it has become.
In this economy, good luck finding even a part-time-Jobs.
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Re:Disagree (Score:5, Funny)
I'd be willing to quit his job for half that.
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Re:Disagree (Score:5, Funny)
Dude, the zune was awesome and I'd say the same thing about my surfce rt.
Re:Disagree (Score:3, Funny)
If I were meeting you in real life, I'd most likely not even bother. You seem to be a dick over the smallest things. You must be an engineer!
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:5, Funny)
Up more than 6% at the moment.
Drop from 10% up, typical profit taking. Probably Bill unloading a chunk.. more money to combat malaria and such
"Steve, could you do that again next week, the announcing your impending retirement?"
Re:Disagree (Score:5, Funny)
Who knows? He might even get ousted after a huge sex scandal that shades what you listed. Think about it.
Why would you bring something like that up? Now I pictured him humping a secretary grunting "Developper Developper Developper!" and my brain bluescreened.
Re:In the next 12 months... (Score:4, Funny)
From throwing chairs to rocking them.