SCO Stock In Danger of Delisting, Again

hweimer writes "In 2005, SCO got into delisting trouble because they failed to file their annual 10-K report in a timely manner. SCO seems to be headed the same way again for a different reason: the stock price is too low to meet Nasdaq's requirements. Quoting: '[W]hat can a company do to boost its share price? Besides stopping to burn money and come up with a working business model, I mean.'"

Daddy Daddy help me

[140Mandak262Jamuna]

Urgent message to Uncle Bill and Uncle Steve, Please stop throwing chairs and throw some money for us. Yours SCO

Re:New CEO

[Bloke down the pub]

Remember, companies don't have to be profitable anymore, they just need enough investors to pay the bills.

Wow, slashdot's slow today - a post from 1997 just arrived.

Re:boosting share price

[WrongSizeGlass]

I guess SCO could buy back their own shares ...

... if they were out of toilet paper or maybe had some other serious paper related dilemma ;-)


warning: The above content may test positive for sarcasm and/or could be a failed attempt at humor and as such should be taken with a pound of salt.

Re:potential source of income

[M. Baranczak]

I'm something of a UNIX insider, and I can tell you that SCO is on to something [...]

Hold him back, he's desperate.

Re:You're on the Titanic

[LearnToSpell]

Tie a bunch of sheets together, making a giant cloth balloon. Attach that to the bucket. Build a fire in the bucket, filling the balloon with hot air. Grab a bottle of champagne to celebrate when the balloon pulls the boat out of the water. Gasp in dismay as you realize you forgot to attach the bucket to the boat.

Re:potential source of income

[WrongSizeGlass]

ever used a C++ compiler? Then you're going to be writing Darl a check.

I'd write him a check today, really I would, but the check writing app I compiled with the aforementioned C++ compiler has a bug in it. I'm working on it Darl, so please be patient.


warning: The above content may test positive for sarcasm and/or could be a failed attempt at humor and as such should be taken with a pound of salt.

In other news...

[Shadow Wrought]

Several news sites are reporting that SCO has filed a lawsuit for $1.5 Billion against NASDAQ for harming their business model. "Our entire operation is predicated off of being able to pump and dump stock," CEO Darl McBride was quoted as saying outside the US Courthouse, "by threatening to delist our stock they are essentially claiming ownership over our business model."

Technology experts Dan Lyons and Maureen O'Gara were also on hand to bolster SCO's claims. "We've seen all the SCO materials and while its far to secret to disclose, there is no doubt in our minds that NASDAQ is actually a front for Groklaw."

I know what they can do....

[SQLz]

"According to our experts, Microsoft has stolen our code and put it into Windows. I have proof right here in my magical breifcase"

Truncated quote

[morgan_greywolf]

Technology experts Dan Lyons and Maureen O'Gara were also on hand to bolster SCO's claims. "We've seen all the SCO materials and while its far to secret to disclose, there is no doubt in our minds that NASDAQ is actually a front for Groklaw."

You left off "...which is actually paid by IBM, Novell and RedHat!"

very viable business model

[teh_chrizzle]

When your business model depends upon litigation

the SCO business model is simply the application of public relations and litigation to a large scale version of the business model employed by that crackhead cousin of yours that shows up at family functions from time to time looking for cash: getting paid to go away.

the sheer number of crackhead cousins in the united states is evidence that this is a viable business model.

Re:What I want to know is...

[Technician]

How soon till SCO stock is cheaper than toilet paper?

It already is. Have you priced a package of toilet paper lately?

Re:You're on the Titanic

[MrNiceguy_KS]

I think someone's been playing too many adventure games.

Re:Easy fix?

[Applekid]

That would make their trading symbol
SCOXD
for 20 days.

I know I'd smile every time I saw it.

"Hey hey, guy, buy shares of SCO! XD"

Actually, he's close ....

[Anonymous Coward]

"I'm something of a UNIX insider, and I can tell you that SCO is on to something [...]"

He's only out by two letters. It should read: " ... SCO is on something ..."

Boosting prices

[Grashnak]

'[W]hat can a company do to boost its share price? Besides stopping to burn money and come up with a working business model, I mean.'"

I suggest sending out 400 million anonymous emails: SCO has announced priority production of devices based on its proprietary technology. Analysts indicate that there is "almost limitless demand for this revolutionary technology". XYZI is rated an immediate and "STRONG BUY".

He can't say who he is or he'd be sued

[davidwr]

He'd be violating the non-disclosure agreement, which says in part:

Agreement between SCO, Inc. and [redacted]:
The party of the second agrees not to disclose any of the lies he hears from the party of the first.

Re:You're on the Titanic

[operagost]

Not enough. He forgot to take the rope from the hanging corpse in the janitor's closet.

Re:Easy fix?

[Opportunist]

would probably accelerate the collapse of the company.

You say that like it's a bad thing...

419 it

[sjwest]

Im wasted....

Dear victim I am prince Uboogkio from Nigeria and my friend I need your help for my Tribal leader King Uboogkio has invested in a firm called Sco who has also been invested in by big companies like Baystar and Microsoft and a lady called Maureen. King Uboogkio personally knows a MR Darl MCBRIDE as being an amazing bisiness man. I need more money and since Sco is where 'IT' is going on Nasdaq I guarantee you dear victim 50% of all of the shares I hold personally and and the King shareholding. To help me and you be RICH BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS I need 1. a copy of your passport 2. $10000 us dollars 3. a telephone number Please email me so i tell you more My best (praise be to Jesus and Allah) Steve (prince) Uboogkio email me [e-mail] Our village awaits news as we are about to sell some children to slave owners - this should inform you on how keen we are on Sco shares.

OK That should do it

Re:If SCO goes out of buisness.

[TangoCharlie]

Here's what happens:
1) Novell gets Unix back.
2) Novell does deal with Microsoft.
3) Novell changes name to SCO.
4) Novell (i.e. SCO) stops SuSE.
5) Novell (SCO) sues IBM.
6) Prifit!

Poor Choice

[archer, the]

Two reasons not to use SCO stock for TP:

1. Paper cuts.

2. Already full of "stuff".

Re:You're on the Titanic

[Anonymous Coward]

2. Look for ways to leverage the remaining company to produce new or enhanced products; thus opening up new sources of revenue.

Okay Bill, start the webcam ... The rest of you, strip naked and start having sex....

It's all clear to me now ...

[WrongSizeGlass]

* Wait for someone to sue someone else
* Wait for it to go badly
* Post to your blog about them needing a new business model
* Post to /. and wait for the /.'ers to follow your link
* Profit!

Maybe Señor Blogger needs a new business model too.


warning: The above content may test positive for sarcasm and/or could be a failed attempt at humor and as such should be taken with a pound of salt.

Re:boosting share price

[jaymzter]

I use Mozilla. What are these "ads" that you and others refer to?

Re:Boosting prices

[Achromatic1978]

Which means that such spam will most likely do more damage than good.

Although we'd never consider suggesting loyal Slashdot readers with access to mail servers might do such a thing ...

NEWSFLASH

[p3d0]

People post stories to Slashdot hoping to draw readers to their site. Shocking!