Former Spy Poisoned By Radiation In UK

Former Spy Poisoned By Radiation In UK 432

Posted by Zonk on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:34PM from the fishy-quite-fishy dept.

An anonymous reader writes "BBC new is reporting the death of the ex-Russian spy Alexander Litvinenko with a major dose of radioactive polonium-210. But nobody knows how it got there. Suspicions have fallen upon the Russian security services (who deny involvement). The task of the pathologists now is to unpick what really killed him and how it was administered. Quite what techniques they will use to solve this puzzle is unclear." From the article: "A post-mortem examination on Mr Litvinenko has not been held yet. The delay is believed to be over concerns about the health implications for those present at the examination. But Roger Cox from the HPA said a large quantity of alpha radiation emitted from polonium-210 had been detected in Mr Litvinenko's urine."

Former Spy Poisoned By Radiation In UK

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Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

by 8127972 ( 73495 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:39PM (#16978240)

......found this curious comment:

"Mr Putin himself has said Mr Litvinenko's death was a tragedy, but he saw no "definitive proof" it was a "violent death"."

Clearly the term "violent death" has a different definition in Russian than it does in English.

In Soviet Russia... (Score:0, Funny)

by Fuckin ROBOTS! ( 999276 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:40PM (#16978250)

Joke Punches YOU!

Symptoms are a dead giveaway (Score:1, Funny)

by 1992 Called ( 893858 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:43PM (#16978282)

Heartburn, Nausea, Indigestion
Upset Stomach, Diarrhea!

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:4, Funny)

by peragrin ( 659227 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:44PM (#16978290)

for polonium to kill you with alpha radiation, it would have to be ingested. The real question is what seasonings they use to cover up the taste. Of course it is british cuisine we are talking about. So they may never know.

Apparently (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:46PM (#16978302)

When it comes to things to avoid eating, apparently, he forgot Polonium!

Re:Symptoms are a dead giveaway (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:49PM (#16978322)

Oh shit, I knew should have passed on that Dhansak [rubymurray.com] last night. Am I fucked?

polonium-210 (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:50PM (#16978330)

Who's to blame? Poland, obviously.

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:2, Funny)

by dewie ( 685736 ) writes: <dbscully AT gmail DOT com> on Friday November 24, 2006 @05:55PM (#16978368)

Not sure if they would be able to put polonium into sushi without him realising?

Isn't it obvious? The wasabi! You could hide anything in that stuff, and no-one would ever taste it. It'd even cover up the telltale green glow!

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:4, Funny)

by CmdrGravy ( 645153 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:04PM (#16978460) Homepage

Yes. Sushi stalwart cornerstone of British cusine since time immemorial.

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:05PM (#16978466)

We have always been allied with Russia. We have always been at war with Islamic fundamentalists.

The same seasoning they use... (Score:2, Funny)

by fuego451 ( 958976 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:09PM (#16978500) Journal

to cover up most dishes: Curry. I had so much curry as a child I now need it to survive. Mmmm, kidney pie.

Re:you fail 1t.. (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:09PM (#16978508)

Red fox, this is blue panda. Please repeat your 3AS, over.

screenplay by Roald Dahl (Score:3, Funny)

by BorgCopyeditor ( 590345 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:22PM (#16978610)

Well, you only live twice.

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

by goddidit ( 988396 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @06:27PM (#16978666)

Minitrue mark the post doubleplusfunny.

Re:screenplay by Roald Dahl (Score:1, Funny)

by dances with elks ( 863490 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @07:12PM (#16979022)

or so they say

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:2, Funny)

by goddidit ( 988396 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @07:19PM (#16979070)

Here comes the woosher to woosh up your head!!

Re:examination (Score:3, Funny)

by chrisbtoo ( 41029 ) writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @07:29PM (#16979136) Journal

A quick read about Polonium shows that its soluble in dilute acids. I wonder if thats how it was introduced?

Pickled ginger FTW!

Re:Polonium-210? What legitimate uses does it have (Score:3, Funny)

by udderly ( 890305 ) * writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @07:33PM (#16979164)

What if rogue clowns from some other planet drove their flying space armadillo to the UK, abducted this guy and used an anal probe to implant the polonium in his ass?

Seriously, have you never heard of Occam's Razor?

Re:Worried, me? (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Friday November 24, 2006 @07:52PM (#16979358)

Now that we know that our "ally" is putting the finishing trim on his capitalist dictatorship, how will our millionaire media airheads and our millionaire government respond? Do I hear crickets?
Easy, Terrorism, Islam, Arabs, Tree-Huggers, Gays, Commies, Atheists. Fear, Uncertainly, Doubt.
Forgotten all about our inconvenient ally yet? No?
Look over there, Paris Hilton! That crazy chick. hehehe. I wonder what she will do next. Yeah, we all know she's crap, so why don't we watch more of her advertising-sponsored videos and let's make fun of her together, hehehe. Crazy chick. hehehe. Oh, oh, oh, you so won't believe what TomKat did yesterday...

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Saturday November 25, 2006 @12:13AM (#16981342)

Sure! They are part of the new axis of evil... it's well known that they have lots of WMD... we should just invade Russia so we can have lower energy prices ... I think I've seen this movie before... :-/

Merry Christmas... (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Saturday November 25, 2006 @04:38PM (#16986214)

Slow, painful, and irreversible death from radiation poisoning [Litvinenko]
Death is usually irreversible. There was this one guy, though...

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Former Spy Poisoned By Radiation In UK 432

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Former Spy Poisoned By Radiation In UK

Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

In Soviet Russia... (Score:0, Funny)

Symptoms are a dead giveaway (Score:1, Funny)

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:4, Funny)

Apparently (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Symptoms are a dead giveaway (Score:1, Funny)

polonium-210 (Score:1, Funny)

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:2, Funny)

Re:History repeating, sort of (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

The same seasoning they use... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:you fail 1t.. (Score:1, Funny)

screenplay by Roald Dahl (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:screenplay by Roald Dahl (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:2, Funny)

Re:examination (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Polonium-210? What legitimate uses does it have (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Worried, me? (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Reading the artcle...... (Score:1, Funny)

Merry Christmas... (Score:1, Funny)

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