Report Blasts "Peak Oil" Theory 640
Rei writes "Today, the Cambridge Energy Research Associates released a report dismissing the Peak Oil theory, suggesting that world oil production will continue to increase for the next 24 years, and then only level into a plateau. The report, which suggests that world reserves are enough to last 122 years at our current rate of consumption, also blasts Peak Oil theorists for repeatedly making unscientific predictions and then shifting them whenever their predictions fail to materialize."
Arr, I be searching for pirate treasure, matey! (Score:2, Funny)
I completely understand their point of view. After all, I have millions of dollars in pirate gold buried in my front yard somewhere, I'm just waiting for technology to advance to the point where I can get a metal detector to find it.
Arr!
Great... (Score:5, Funny)
How FAR we've come!!! (Score:2, Funny)
Yes, indeed. We used to have wooden houses on concrete or stone foundations, and there were actually primitive devices that burned substances or gas for heat. Sure is nice now we have houses made from General Products spaceship hull material anchored to the ground with varying-phase quantum force fields. That is, if you are one of the few without a house floating in the air. And to imagine that they used to have to bring water in and out in pipes????
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:5, Funny)
John Denver, American folk singer-songwriter, Poet Laureat of Colorado, author of "Take Me Home, Country Roads" and "Leaving on a Jet Plane"
Don Pearson, management consultant and executive of Folsom, CA's "eRepublic"; trainer of Allstate Insurance Company managers and salesmen in the tenets of L. Ron Hubbard's "management by statistics" approach.
Frederik "Fred" Deburghgraeve, shoe salesman; former Belgian olympic swimmer and olympic gold medalist in the 100 meter breaststroke in the 1996 Olympic Games
Gerald Mosse, principle horse rider to the Aga Khan IV; former apprentice of Patrick-Loiuse Biancone and rider for Francois Boutin. Rode Arazi to five straight wins in France.
Arazi: A thoroughbred chestnut colt who won the 1991 Breeders' Cup Juvenile. Has crooked white blaze on forehead.
Ficus carica: the Common Fig; small tree native to the eastern Mediterranean and southwest Asia; deciduous, with 3-5 cm fruit.
Vanadium: A chemical element of the periodic table, with atomic number 23. A rare, soft, ductile element used in alloying; good resistance to sulfuric acid.
Three: A number, numeral, and glyph; the natural number following 2, but preceeding 4; the first unique prime; the second triangular number; integral divisor of natural numbers whose digits add up to a multiple of three.
Re:Who pays their bills? (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:3, Funny)
John Denver is no better than those oil company heads. "Leaving on a Jet Plane"? Do you have *any* idea how much carbon that emits?
Real Greens *walk*. Okay, I take that back, *real* real Greens practice Tantric arts to breathe as little as possible, thus reducing their carbon footprint to the bare minimum.
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:2, Funny)
Five is RIGHT OUT, however.
Re:Who pays their bills? (Score:3, Funny)
Yeah, come on! Ad hominem attacks against people work great! They are super useful! And they're sooooo much easier than thinking.
We've had a lot more success since we started appealing to the fear and hatred of people than when we appealed to their intellect. Fund-raising is way up! And we can convince our followers of anything we want. We just tell them that Tobacco companies lied to promote the other side and the cash rolls in.
The press loves us too. You can't teach people economics in a 15-second sound byte, but you can scare them. "Why the tobacco companies lied about Peak Oil and DRM and how it'll kill your children tomorrow morning! Tonight on the 11 o'clock news. Don't miss it!"
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:4, Funny)
All the more ironic since he crashed while trying to reach the fuel selector knob...
Slashdot refused to print this story (Score:5, Funny)
Exxon-Mobil announces that PEAK OIL is coming in 5 years:
http://www.thebulletin.org/article.php?art_ofn=mj
Mind you, this is a major oil corporation, not some environmentalist "whacko" group...
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:1, Funny)
your funny
I'm glad you found it amusing, but that should be "you're" funny.
Re:Well, let's take a look at the speakers (Score:3, Funny)
I give up. How many?
Trick question! (Score:4, Funny)