Your Chance to Meet Bill Gates 529
tcak writes "From the CNET article: "You could meet the chairman of Microsoft, but you'll have to profess a passion for Windows first. Microsoft is looking for true stories about people using Windows computers to pursue a passion or hobby. The company plans to use them in a marketing blitz tied to the 20th anniversary of Windows' debut. ""
Wonderful (Score:5, Funny)
How many of us will pretend to love windows just to get a chance to relive some fond memories [zpub.com]?
Microsoft is looking for true stories about people using Windows computers to pursue a passion or hobby.
So now they have to bribe Windows users for positive reviews, eh? Seems about right.
my only question is... (Score:5, Funny)
haha (Score:2, Funny)
Oh yes... making neat internet worms!
Totally love Windows (Score:1, Funny)
We tried working with Windows... (Score:2, Funny)
Once he'd got Windows up and running we let the users try it out. It all seemed fine to start with: Windows was a pretty good replacement for DOS and the users could still do their work as normal.
Alas it did not stay that way. After a few days, I had lost count of the number of complaints received from users who could not find things they were used to (like the command line) or tasks they could not perform that they previously could with the DOS. The constant crashing began to make using Windows a burden on our office supplies. The final straw came when one employee lost several hours work when Windows suddenly had an error reading from our network and corrupted his pr0n collection.
Needless to say, the Windows team offered no support whatsoever. I made the employee remove Windows from the offices and lets just say he's not with us anymore.
Second prize (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Apple's Switch (Score:5, Funny)
That's the whole idea.
Another Microsoft innovation!
I use Windows at work! (Score:5, Funny)
Do I get to meet Bill now?
ObSimpsons (Score:2, Funny)
A passion for windows (Score:2, Funny)
Dear Bill, (Score:2, Funny)
Suddenly I feel like David Carradine... (Score:5, Funny)
Anyone here old enought to remember Death Race 2000 [imdb.com]? Remember why Frankenstein (David Carradine) wanted so badly to win the race?
^_^
That was awesome! (Score:5, Funny)
Me: Remember that time you released windows?
Bill: Yeah
Me: That was awesome!
pursue a passion or hobby (Score:5, Funny)
I use Windows to persue my hobbies, which include
phishing, spamming, cracking and distributing illegal files via p2p !
I have a real passion for windows !
Porn (Score:2, Funny)
Download ISOs (Score:2, Funny)
Using Windows to pursue a passion? (Score:1, Funny)
Microsoft is looking for true stories about people using Windows computers to pursue a passion or hobby.
Does masochism count?
Well, I don't particularily want to meet him... (Score:2, Funny)
Well at leats in france it will be easy (Score:2, Funny)
You mean *this* was awesome... (Score:5, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:4, Funny)
Don't forget to bring (Score:5, Funny)
You fake it (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Passion (Score:5, Funny)
You don't know any passionate Windows hater?
Re:Wonderful (Score:5, Funny)
Re:If a story could ever be marked as Flamebait... (Score:4, Funny)
OOH! OOH! PICK ME! PICK ME!!! (Score:4, Funny)
"Hi, um, Bill, er, um, Mr. Gates. I love Windows so much, I have the logo tattoed on my heiny. Want to see it?"
"What?? That's copyright infringement!! Guards, place this manboy under arrest!!"
Re:my only question is... (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:2, Funny)
So I guess my essay on how I use Windows to pursue my passion because I can't get the shit to run right under WINE yet is right out?
KFG
Re:Wonderful (Score:4, Funny)
"It was a good paper, too." --Ellen Feiss
Ob. Simpsons... (Score:3, Funny)
Bill if your gonna buy reviews, use cash like the the hardware and gaming industries. Stop being a cheapass!
Re:Wonderful (Score:5, Funny)
A protracted light saber fight ensues, at the end of which the defeated MASTER STALLMAN escapes DARTH GEEKIOUS by crawling through a Unix pipe and going into self-imposed exile in the GNU system. There he waits until the New Hope, LINUS PENGUINSTALKER is ready to begin his training in the arts of the VI KNIGHTS.
Re:Passion - Gizoogle style (Score:5, Funny)
My deep abiding love for Windows (Score:5, Funny)
I find screens fascinating. Just by looking at a screen, you can learn anything in the realm of human knowledge. There is no limit to the things one can learn by applying yourself to screens.
When writing, I find the word "of" to be a significant help in stringing together words into coherent sentences. I am so grateful to my elementary school teachers for introducing me to this wonderful word.
I cannot get the idea of death out of my mind. It haunts me, it consumes me, it puzzles me. I think about it endlessly.
Is there any wonder why I have a deep and abiding love for Windows?
Re:Wonderful (Score:2, Funny)
Fond memories... (Score:2, Funny)
So one day, I was using Windows, and after it locked up on me for the 8th time after trying to install a video driver, so began my passion for Linux...
Ellen Fleiss for Windows (Score:4, Funny)
Oh yeah, Bill Gates is teh bomb.
Re:You fake it (Score:4, Funny)
I guess they were afraid to ask for stories about people who use Windows in a critical environment. I think I should put an entry in:
"My passion is screaming at my computer when it blue screens in the middle of a deathmatch. Late-night REGEDIT sessions whenever Windows hoses itself is an amusing hobby too. For everything else, there's FreeBSD."
Damn, I wish writing all contest entry essays were that easy.
First Prize, a meeting with Bill Gates... (Score:5, Funny)
Pick Me!!! (Score:1, Funny)
Thanks to Windows, I have a new hobby. Cleaning up borked machines for friends and family members. Without Windows, and your enlightened guidance, that would not be possible.
Signed
A near suicidal geek
Re:my only question is... (Score:2, Funny)
SCENE: Chamber of Bill Gates
Bill Gates: So...how did you defeat, RedHat, YellowDog, and UNIX? For these foes ever elude us.
Nameless: I used a powerful virus.
*candles flicker*
Bill Gates: So...you come for me...for this is a lie. Everyone knows there is no virus which can defeat all these enemies. No OS but Windows allows such possibilities.
But...before you destroy me...understand I was trying to bring all OSes together under one system! That system is Longhorn!
Nameless: Umm. Yeah. Have you ever seen the source for Windows? I mean, just look at SP2 for XP. A code warrior could not possibly wade through such an army of such colossal hackery.
BG: I...I have nothing to say to that. Guards! Bring in Ballmer, skilled in the ways of the Monkey! You will not defeat us!
My hobby and passion... (Score:4, Funny)
Windows does it for me every time.
Thank you Windows.
Re:Wonderful (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:5, Funny)
RMS is the wookie (mostly because he won't need a costume).
Re:Wonderful (Score:3, Funny)
Do you honestly believe Stallman would have ANYTHING to do with a group by the name of VI Knights?
;)
Jw
Comment removed (Score:4, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Who do I get to meet if I HATE WINDOS? (Score:3, Funny)
If that doesn't work, you get to meet Guido and Fat Tony.
Re:my only question is... (Score:1, Funny)
"The Passion Of The Windows User" (Score:2, Funny)
2. The software lock-in is laid upon him.
3. His first Blue Screen Of Death.
4. He meets his confounded smart-ass know-it-all nephew, who uses Linux.
5. Irving his neighbour is called in to try to fix the damned computer.
6. Windows User's hard disk is wiped by a virus written in VB Script.
7. His second Blue Screen Of Death.
8. He meets the women of P2P pr0n but cannot see them because Windows Media Player will not enable him to play files with DRM content.
9. His third Blue Screen Of Death.
10. He is stripped of his money upgrading to the latest version of Microsoft Office.
11. He is mortified by Clippy.
12. He distributes a Word doc without realizing that "hidden" text can be made visible; he loses his job.
13. He visits a site with MS Internet Explorer and hackers in Vladivostok change his local settings.
14. He is laid to rest waiting for Longhorn.
How to get flamed - the easy way. (Score:2, Funny)
Re:Wonderful (Score:3, Funny)
"Mr Gates, I really enjoy using your windows platform as the premiere choice for writing my home-made viruses, spywares and adwares. It's easy to do. You don't even need a virus development tool kit. It comes with every version of windows."
Re:Wonderful (Score:1, Funny)
Re:Passion FOR Microsoft's products?! (Score:2, Funny)
And people call Unix cryptic.....
samba or wine (Score:3, Funny)