Universal Emulators Return

Universal Emulators Return 546

Posted by Hemos on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:00AM from the and-soon-lead-to-helium-3 dept.

webmilhouse writes "Wired has an article about Transitive Corporation that claims their software "allows any software application binary to run on any processor/operating system" without any performance hit. That would allow any program written for Windows to run on Linux or Mac, and vice-versa, which Wired likened to digital alchemy. The Transitive software is supposed to be released today. What do you think, vaporware or miracle?"

Universal Emulators Return

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Remember... (Score:5, Funny)

by Steve G Swine ( 49788 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:02AM (#10235046) Journal

... if nothing runs at all, everything runs equally well.

Today's Poll (Score:5, Funny)

by eSims ( 723865 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:05AM (#10235084) Homepage

Transitive Software:
1. Vaporware
2. Miracle
4. Coyboy Neal

Personally, I vote it's just Coyboy Neal at it again.

Vaporware (Score:5, Funny)

by g0bshiTe ( 596213 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:07AM (#10235107)

Does this mean I can finally get WINE to work under Windows?

Vaporware, Miracle, ORrrr... (Score:2, Funny)

by Sgt_Jake ( 659140 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:08AM (#10235116) Journal

Gag order, lawsuit, violation of the DMCA and/or Patriot Act and theft of 'Intellectual Property'.

And SCO will sue. Think about it.

Write once, run everywhere (Score:2, Funny)

by slaad ( 589282 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:09AM (#10235128)

Pfft. That's already been done [sun.com].

She wanted a reason..... (Score:5, Funny)

by SomeoneGotMyNick ( 200685 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:09AM (#10235141) Journal

allows any software application binary to run on any processor/operating system

My wife said, "Give me a good reason why you need to keep those things! There's not enough room in the closet to put my shoes."

Now I can use this as an excuse to hold on to my Commodore 64 stuff.

wow, that takes some nerve (Score:2, Funny)

by John_Allen_Mohammed ( 811050 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:09AM (#10235144)

to name your new company the "tranvestite corporation." I guess it makes sense considering the product they're selling but, sheesh

Kinda ironic isn't it... (Score:5, Funny)

by arock99 ( 612650 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:12AM (#10235186)

That they claim their software is fast but yet their web site is reaaaaaaaaaaly slow

Great Success Story! (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:13AM (#10235192)

Given the illusive nature of their product, it is especially incredible that they were able to get five of the world's largest computer OEM's on board so early.

Now you can run any software, anywhere, with no speed hit (relative to a 4.77 MHz PC XT or a C= 64 or a 512K Mac) on hardware from these everyday major name brand OEM's:

Billy-Bo's Bayou's only Computer OEM
Wang Tu Short Compuder OEM of China
DR CLEMENT OKUN NIGERIA BUSINESS COMPUTER MANUFACTURERS
San Rio Hello Kitty Laptop Division
TransitivePC & Electronics

Act now, because supplies of this software are very limited, and once this run is completed, no more can be made (because their damn drunk coders crashed a pickup truck into their RAID array)!

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

by Atreide ( 16473 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:13AM (#10235195)

maybe because it's not vapor anymore ?
it's already evaporated !

Re:Games Games Games (Score:2, Funny)

by nkh ( 750837 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:13AM (#10235201) Journal

and maybe we could install WindowsXP on Linux and it would be fast and reliable!

Fine print (Score:5, Funny)

by archeopterix ( 594938 ) * writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:16AM (#10235223) Journal

It runs everything (1) on everything (2) without performance hit (3).
(1) Uhm, err, the current version only runs Pacman, which required some modifications to the binary
(2) only on Windows XP, but we're working on the Win 98 version.
(3) The technology used allows for theoretical performance equal or even exceeding the native hardware. This will work in next version, "FlyingPig 6.0".

Re:It runs on magic (Score:5, Funny)

by no reason to be here ( 218628 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:16AM (#10235226) Homepage

sounds like this was written in some new programming language, perhaps one based on Magic.

So how much mana would I need tapped to run Photoshop in Linux?

lead to gold (Score:3, Funny)

by bodrell ( 665409 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:17AM (#10235236) Journal

What do you think, vaporware or miracle?
Is this a survey? Then I vote vaporware. Is digital alchemy kinda like Wicca?

Re:She wanted a reason..... (Score:4, Funny)

by savagedome ( 742194 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:17AM (#10235250)

If you start giving her good reasons to keep Commodore 64 stuff, you might have to give her a good reason to keep YOU eventually ;)

Just a thought.

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

by Kierthos ( 225954 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:19AM (#10235265) Homepage

So if it went from glossy brochues to vaporware, would it be product sublimation?

Kierthos

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

by GileadGreene ( 539584 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:22AM (#10235299) Homepage

Did you mean VAPORWARE? Perhaps you should have taken some more time on your careful wording... :)

Re:Kinda ironic isn't it... (Score:5, Funny)

by ZoolTheNinja ( 780596 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:22AM (#10235306) Homepage

Well of course it's slow! They are emulating IIS on WinNT, all running on a Commodore 64!

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

by BobTheAtheist ( 805111 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:27AM (#10235362)

He just translated it to another language on the fly without most people even noticing. You must be a power user.

slashdotted - vaporized (Score:3, Funny)

by tsager ( 196659 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:32AM (#10235406) Homepage Journal

See, the domain already vanished...

I bet that webserver was emulated. No perfomance loss..ha!

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:33AM (#10235427)

Well, looking at their website, I'd say the vapour is not going to hold -- otherwise they'd have their webserver emulate a way faster machine with a significantly faster Internet connection... ;-)

Re:Antitrust; shunning the Mac users (Score:3, Funny)

by gfxguy ( 98788 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:34AM (#10235434)

Antitrust. Microsoft has been convicted before in multiple jurisdictions and will be convicted again. A repeat offender should draw a real penalty.

That's an interesting word..."should".

As Cletus the slackjaw yokel told more "Shoulda but didna."

I saw a beta test! (Score:5, Funny)

by Atryn ( 528846 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:37AM (#10235460) Homepage

Confirmed! I saw a beta test of this product. It was used during the filming of Independence Day. They successfully used the program to upload and execute a virus from a Mac to a never-before-seen Alien computer system. It was even able to display graphics without having prior experience with the displays in question!

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

by strider44 ( 650833 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:41AM (#10235517)

nope vapourware :P

Emulated Web Server?? (Score:2, Funny)

by Jumpin' Jon ( 731892 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:44AM (#10235539)

To prove it's not vapourware, I think they're running a C64, emulating NT4, hosting IIS for their Web server.

Bangalore (Score:2, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:46AM (#10235555)

You just need a fast internet connection... it transmits the entire code to a cadre of Indian programmers who quickly perform the translation and then it's sent back to your computer.

Genius!

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

by skraps ( 650379 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:54AM (#10235646)

All of you naysayers take note:
This is not vaporware! I am on the beta test team for this product. In fact, right now, I just fired up a copy of Duke Nukem Forever on OS/2. Works like a champ.

Re:OT: where is that from? (Score:0, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @10:56AM (#10235659)

"Foreword." The word is "foreword."

You fucking imbecile.

Re:Tortoises all the way down. (Score:3, Funny)

by TurtlesAllTheWayDown ( 688108 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @11:09AM (#10235797)

Er. I resen^Hmble that :/

That'll be some feat! (Score:3, Funny)

by His name cannot be s ( 16831 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @11:13AM (#10235833) Journal

That'll be some feat!

I can't even run my Windows binaries full speed on Windows, how the fuck are they going to put MacOS binaries full speed on Windows?

Tell me that!

feh!

It pegged by BS meter before I got to the page. I'm pretty sure that it's going to be like the magical compression that can compress anything down to 256 bytes.

Note to moderators: (Score:1, Funny)

by Anonymous Coward writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @11:14AM (#10235850)

This is intended to be "funny", not "informative".
If you don't "get it", please do not moderate.

Re:Any program? (Score:1, Funny)

by logic hack ( 800754 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @11:42AM (#10236150) Homepage

Or windows on PowerPC.
I see the Mac ejecting the defiled hard disk, sprouting a pair of robotic legs, and running home to Steve crying.

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:4, Funny)

by Croaker ( 10633 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @12:59PM (#10236948)

Hmm... well, to prove their product actually works (and to confuse the hell out of Netcraft) they could host their site on IIS running under OS X.

Re:Any program? (Score:2, Funny)

by b1scuit ( 795301 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @03:18PM (#10238685)

"Or windows on PowerPC."
That kind of thinking brought us the v6 Mustang and 'fitness water'. Just because you can...

want to impress me? (Score:3, Funny)

by Cynikal ( 513328 ) writes: on Monday September 13, 2004 @04:51PM (#10239623) Homepage

show me doom 3 running on my windows pc.

There may be more comments in this discussion. Without JavaScript enabled, you might want to turn on Classic Discussion System in your preferences instead.

Remember... (Score:5, Funny)

Today's Poll (Score:5, Funny)

Vaporware (Score:5, Funny)

Vaporware, Miracle, ORrrr... (Score:2, Funny)

Write once, run everywhere (Score:2, Funny)

She wanted a reason..... (Score:5, Funny)

wow, that takes some nerve (Score:2, Funny)

Kinda ironic isn't it... (Score:5, Funny)

Great Success Story! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Games Games Games (Score:2, Funny)

Fine print (Score:5, Funny)

Re:It runs on magic (Score:5, Funny)

lead to gold (Score:3, Funny)

Re:She wanted a reason..... (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Kinda ironic isn't it... (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

slashdotted - vaporized (Score:3, Funny)

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Antitrust; shunning the Mac users (Score:3, Funny)

I saw a beta test! (Score:5, Funny)

Re:Any program? (Score:3, Funny)

Emulated Web Server?? (Score:2, Funny)

Bangalore (Score:2, Funny)

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:5, Funny)

Re:OT: where is that from? (Score:0, Funny)

Re:Tortoises all the way down. (Score:3, Funny)

That'll be some feat! (Score:3, Funny)

Note to moderators: (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Any program? (Score:1, Funny)

Re:Not Vapor and not the arrival of Christ (Score:4, Funny)

Re:Any program? (Score:2, Funny)

want to impress me? (Score:3, Funny)

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