NYT Discovers Internet's Wild Side: IRC

maztec writes "The New York Times (free soul-sucking registration required) published an article today entitled The Internet's Wilder Side. Apparently, according to the article, 'the Internet has come to resemble a pleasant, well-policed suburb , [but] a little-known neighborhood known as Internet Relay Chat remains the Wild West.' In essence the article concerns itself with how IRC is the breeding ground of all the Internet's Evils, from animal pornography and illegal file sharing to virus making and computer cracking, it all starts here. I'd continue pointing out interesting quotes, but that'd be a waste. Go read it yourself. And if you're on IRC, remember, you're evil. Even if you're one of those do-gooders who uses Mozilla, LFS, or FreeNode servers for software development."

God forbid

[Corbets]

I can't wait to see what happens when they discover newsgroups. Man, their heads will pop. ;)

Such a discovery!

[Jaywalk]

Wow. The New York Times has discovered IRC. What an amazing discovery. What are they going to discover next? Pennsylvania? I'd love to hear their hard-hitting expose about Pittsburgh.

How many years has IRC been running?

[Black Rabbit]

Next thing you know, they'll be raving about the wonders of Archie, Veronica and Gopher!

Thanks for the heads up...

[jejones]

I guess I need to work on a maniacal laugh or on holding my extended pinkie to the corner of my mouth. And there I thought I was just getting help with Gentoo and Fedora Core 2 Test 3...

Thank god...

[Lugor]

..they haven't found bash.org [bash.org] yet!

Well policed suburbs?

[Roadkills-R-Us]

Obviously, they're refering to usenet. I mean, I haven't seen a fatal shooting there in quite some time.

Darn! Now average joe will use it and ruin it

[Anonymous Coward]

Time to go back to BBS for all the evil stuff.

/list

[Himring]

IRC is the breeding ground of all the Internet's Evils

It was in 1996 that I developed my eye twitch. That was just after having read /list for the first time on efnet....

If they think IRC is bad

[Tebriel]

they should see Ebay. There's some weird shit for sale there....

I, for one...

[thedogcow]

I, for one, welcome our new evil IRC overlords...

But truly, you want to know something that is the epitome of evil, that represents fire and brimstone, and a general sense of Rotting.... Netsplits!

Oh the Horror!

In Other News...

[Vaginal Discharge]

President Bush sends US Marshalls into IRC to try to bring law and order.

they just discovered it?

[Savatte]

Talk about being late to a party. They are later than my girlfriend's period. zing!

Just saw a discussion in #hackers...

[jez9999]

<b1lbo> The NYT has an article on us being 'evil'! Just saw it on Slashdot, go see it :-P
<creat1ve> What?
<creat1ve> Damn.. they suck!!
<creative> hack-bot, DDOS nytimes.com
<hack-bot> Initializing DDOS

...

<l1ght> Haha, nytimes.com down :-) That'll teach them to badmouth irc, thank god for that Slammer virus that let us build up those zombies!

Animal Porno?

[toupsie]

You mean the Discovery channel distributes on IRC? How many times have I seen two Rhinos doing the nasty with some British snooty guy narrating on PBS? Please, NY Times. This is nothing new. Heck, I even got a shot of flies getting busy [mac.com] on my balcony. You would think these New York City folk wouldn't be such prudes.

Re:Such a discovery!

[TWX]

"Wow. The New York Times has discovered IRC. What an amazing discovery. What are they going to discover next? Pennsylvania? I'd love to hear their hard-hitting expose about Pittsburgh."

Wait'll they discover that IRC is twelve years old! I think that the protocol is older than most of the people that use it, at least on a mental level.

Lol

[SatanicPuppy]

I can't believe they're hitting on IRC. How behind the times is this?

Ahhh, I remember being a lad, hacking IRC chatrooms. Nothing like finding some chat room dedicated to evil wankers, escalating yourself to moderator, and booting everyone.

Simple pleasures.

How about the Post?

[michael path]

In other news, the Washington Post discovers that they have the internet for computers now [prolix.nu].

Re:Such a discovery!

[gmuslera]

Well, in the mid-90's there was a lot of hype (not sure if in the media) about a document that described how to build atomic bombs.

Of course, that document started saying something like "go to your local grocery store and buy 3 kg of U-235" :)

Bwhahahahaha

[Lord Graga]

"I.R.C. is where you are going to find your 'elite' level pirates,'' said John R. Wolfe, director for enforcement at the Business Software Alliance, a trade group that fights software piracy."

rofl,im1337h4xx0r!iwill0wnj00rb0x0r!

Re:seems odd

[Glonoinha]

That depends. We talking animals with other animals, or animals with people? The former you can find on the Discovery Channel; the latter, not so much.

Re:why is it always me that does this?

[oordaz]

you got this link in a IRC channel. . . right?

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:How many years has IRC been running?

[Black Rabbit]

Was there ever an Internet app called Big Ethel?

Re:IRC isn't the cause...

[mrtroy]

I believe the article proves you are incorrect. IRC is not just a medium, apparently.
Yet that pirated copy of Microsoft Office or Norton Utilities that turns up on a home-burned CD-ROM may well have originated on I.R.C.
Pirated software can originate from IRC itself (not the clients or the servers)
The whole idea behind I.R.C. is freedom of speech. There is really no structure on the Internet for policing I.R.C., and there are intentionally no rules. Obviously you're not allowed to hack the Pentagon, but there are no rules like 'You can't say this' or 'You can't do that.'
You can hack the pentagon from IRC, you just arent supposed to.

Re:Well, of course it's wild.

[Mdalek]

errm....because we're all dying to know.

Re:Just saw a discussion in #hackers...

[HeghmoH]

That is such an obvious fake. If you're going to post made-up IRC discussions, you should at least use proper IRC grammar, such as no capital letters, missing or incorrect punctuation, etc. You're not even trying to be believable!

What about Yahoo! Chat?

[Anonymous Coward]

If IRC is evil, then Yahoo! Chat is the 7th level of Hell. At least IRC has real moderators.

Re:God forbid

[JaffaKREE]

I always suspected I was an evil, conniving, warez trading, mp3 album pre-releasing, movie theater recording and distributing bastard from the moment I typed /server irc.dal.net lo those many years ago. Now I know for sure. Time to go kill some puppies and take pictures and post them in #MurderedPuppies.

Re:Lol

[Orgazmus]

and "moderator" dont help

its called #channels and operators.
n00b

Re:God forbid

[Alexis Brooke]

This IRC thing sounds pretty bad. I can't wait for the New York Times to do a report on the 1995 documentary "Hackers".

Two Comments

[Kozar_The_Malignant]

>And if you're on IRC, remember, you're evil.

First, that's Doctor Evil to you.

Second, one wonders what sort of fit the NYT would have if someone ever tells them about Usenet.

One of my old sigs was...

[Samurai Cat!]

..."IRC: Making megalomaniacs out of little boys since 1985" :P

Wait till they find all the pr0n

[bl8n8r]

The soccer moms are going to freak out.

Need proof?

[Rorschach1]

Don't believe IRC is evil? Just try logging on with an even remotely female-sounding nick sometime.

Re:Such a discovery!

[isopossu]

Did you know IRC is of Finnish origin? As is linux.

Ban the commie-cracker-pornloving Finland!

Re:Just saw a discussion in #hackers...

[halo8]

+h3 ny+ h@z @N @r+ic13 0N u$ b3iNg '3vi1'! ju$+ $@\/\/ i+ 0N $1@$hd0+, g0 $33 i+ :-P
\/\/h@+?
d@MN.. +h3y $ux0r!!
h@x0r-b0+, dd0$ ny+iM3$.c0M
iNi+i@1iziNg dd0$ ...

h@h@, ny+iM3$.c0M d0\/\/N :-) +h@+'11 +3@ch +h3M +0 b@dM0u+h irc, +h@N/ g0d ph0r +h@+ $1@Mm3r viru$ +h@+ 13+ u$ bui1d uP +h0$3 z0Mbi3$!

Re:How many years has IRC been running?

[jandrese]

What? Without Gopher where am I supposed to find copies of wuftp for Windows 3.1 and news on the 1995 Nobel Prize winners?

Actually, Gopher is great for looking back at what the internet looked like 8 years ago, when the last update was made to a Gopher site.

Re:God forbid

[pyros]

First rule of Usenet: You do NOT talk about Usenet!!

Re:Thanks for the heads up...

[prat393]

And there I thought I was just getting help with Gentoo and Fedora Core 2 Test 3...

You're mixing them? Diabolical!

Re:why is it always me that does this?

[nutshell42]

Even as much of the Internet has come to resemble a pleasant, well-policed suburb

oh yeah [zoy.org] (beware, goatse ahead =)

Re:God forbid

[Three Headed Man]

On'tday alktay aboutyay ethay ewsgroupsnay!

Re:Lol

[jantheman]

pfft - it's chan & op :P

Re:If they think IRC is bad

[Laur]

Not that I can find. [ebay.com] ;)

Rules

[Anonymous Coward]

The first rule of USENET: DON'T talk about USENET!

The second rule of USENET: DON'T talk about USENET!

heh

[EMH_Mark3]

We're all doomed if they discover bash.org [bash.org] :)

Where did they dig up that old FOSSIL?!?!?!?!?!?

[xystren]

To quote our most favorate scoundral, and smuggler....

Where did you dig up that old FOSSIL?!?!?!?!?!?!

Where in the galaxy, (far, far away obiously) did this writer come up with this information? The WEB a "Plesent and well policed suburb"?!@?!?!?!?!? Has this SETH SCHIESEL even been on the internet? What about popups? What about Adware? What about that damn "comet cursor"

Where the heck has this SETH SCHIESEL been?

I can see it now... An Interview with SETH SCHIESEL by Xystren

Xystren : "We would like to welcome SS, foremost NY Times expert on the internet. Welcome SS"

ss : "Thank you, it's a pleasure being here, and more importantly, to provide information about the internet. There are many bad areas in the internet, just like there are bad neighbourhoods in larger citys"

Xystren : "Oh? Is that so? You sound surprised that the internet can be a dangerous place?"

ss : "Well of course, it's not like a policed suburb, we are talking a bad, industral area type thing, you know, where gangs, drugs, and the underground types hang out, ready to mug or hijack you at the earliest opportunity"

Xystren : "Where exactly have you been going to find these nice "suburbs" as you have put it.

ss : "Well, at my work computer (I don't have the internet at home, you see), I go on the internet and search for things. It's really quite a wonderfull tool to tell the truth. All the NY times stories and such. It's really a wonderfull and safe and informative place."

Xystren : "so your saying that you've only gone onto the internet, via the NY Times article search?"

ss : "Exactly!"

Xystren : [trying to contain laughter] "Are you aware that would be condsidered an "inTRAnet" and not the "inTERnet??"

ss : "Uhh, well, they sound the same, aren't they the same thing?"

Xystren : No, they aren't the same things. [turning head shouting] "John, I thought you screened these people, Where did you dig up that old FOSSIL?!?!?!?!?!?! SS doesn't know jack about the internet.[Sorry Xyst, we had time we needed to fill]

SS : Old Fossil? what does that mean?

Xystren : "Why don't you go look it up on google, yahoo, or lycos??"

SS : "What are those?"

Xystren : "What are those!?!?!?!???? What do you mean what are those? They are some of the Internet's most common and popular search engines! Are you even the least bit familar about the internet at all? Have you heard of popups? have you heard about malware? infact, do you even know what browser is???

ss : "Well uhhh, no...."

Xystren : "Where did you even get your information for you research??"

ss : "well, uhh, ummm..."

Xystren : "I can tell, you got it from /. didn't you? ADMIT IT! You did didn't you?

ss : [sheepishly replies] uhh, yeah...

Xystren : "So there you have it, another non-NERD trying to use "News for Nerd - The stuff that matters". This is the real danger of the internet people, BEWARE!


What more can I say???

ss : "I still don't get this 'old fossil'"

Xystren : "it's ok ss, your not a nerd, your not ment to get it"

---
if you can't dazzel them with dexterity, baffle them with bu))$h!t

Re:Such a discovery!

[gkwok]

What about Pu-36? Oh goody! My illudium Pu-36 explosive space modulator! <boom>

Re:Such a discovery!

[PReDiToR]

Well the article says

Oh there's always one, isn't there? You had to show off that you Read TFA.

Re:God forbid

[caluml]

and effected the operation of a large ISP as a result.

They started up their own ISP? Wow, that's evil tactics.

Re:Such a discovery!

[pilgrim23]

I rememeber getting a "Secret picture of a Atomic Bomb schematic" years ago. I may still have it. Its ok though. To preserve national security it is in a format almost impossible to decrypt: Apple Newton Book format.

Re:Animal Porno?

[TeknoHog]

two Rhinos doing the nasty with some British snooty guy

Am I the only one here with a dirty imagination?

I just emailed the NYT

[WormholeFiend]

I just emailed the NYT with the following:

"You think IRC is bad? Just wait until you see what Slashdot.org is saying about you and your article!"

Next up in tomorrow's edition of the NYT, an 'in-depth' analysis of the Slashdot editorial ethics and comment threads.

In related news...

[Mikoca]

VoC (voice over copper) might have its legal uses but it is also one of the preferred meeting places of pimps, drug dealers and maybe even terorists. And don't think you are protected, as most homes are known to have a VoC access points, connected in the same network with public ones that can connect you with unthinkable villainry for as low as 50c. Fortunately, the FBI has been working on getting VoC surveillance rights that will ensure your safety, so hang on tight, you will be completely safe soon!

Re:God forbid

[pete.com]

Police, FBI, and other law enforcement agencies don't seize computer equipment unless it is directly involved in a commision of the crime (such as a hackers PC). If they need the data they take dd copies with them for analysis later. In teh case of Contraband such as child porn it would be eliminated before they left.

The real IRC!

[NeGz]

A little long, oh well, you can't be banned from Slashdot? Right? Right..? :/

00:57 (NeGz) god I hate media FUD like that NY Times article on IRC
00:57 (NeGz) just saw it then
00:57 (@Yavin) yer its crazy
00:58 (@Yavin) "this just in, there is a secret BBS on the intarweb!!!!"
00:58 (@Yavin) "crossing LIVE to Trishia Takinawa, with a report on the hotline protocol!"
00:59 (@Yavin) wtlw NYT!
00:59 @Yavin gets all angry
00:59 (@Devar) lol Yavin
00:59 (@Nevyn^) what _are_ you on about
00:59 (NeGz) but you read this shit and you understand why some people will never bank over the net and such :/
01:00 (@Yavin) this Nevyn^: http://slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=04/05/06/132523 1
01:00 (NeGz) http://www.nytimes.com/2004/05/06/technology/circu its/06chat.html?pagewanted=2&ei=5062&en=a1bb0d2c7d 187e80&ex=1084420800&partner=GOOGLE
01:00 @Yavin moderates NeGz -1, Redundant
01:00 (NeGz) sif
01:00 (NeGz) direct link to article
01:00 (NeGz) +5 Informative, every time
01:00 (@Yavin) hehe
01:01 (NeGz) rah
01:02 (NeGz) need an educational campaign
01:02 (NeGz) GAMFUD - Geeks Against Media Fear, Uncertanity and Doubt -_-
01:02 (@Yavin) or we could hire a bus, deck it out in wifi and tour the countryside. paint "The Clue Bus" on it and inform people on why tech isnt evil
01:03 (@Yavin) or we could idle on irc and bitch about stuff
01:03 (NeGz) have the headline of gamfud.org as PEBKAC
01:03 (NeGz) yeah, idling sounds good
01:03 (NeGz) also sleep
01:03 (@Yavin) give articles such as that NYT piece the bigg rubber stamp of FAILURE
01:04 (NeGz) I'm amazed that there are guys in my network security classes at Tafe that won't bank over the net :/
01:04 (Ultima84) I bank over the net...
01:04 (@Devar) rofl, they wont? man i fucking do everything over the net hey
01:04 (@Yavin) haha yeah
01:04 (NeGz) all you need is enough knowhow to check that you're not being phished/DNS spoofed and that the damn site's SSL cert is legit/secure :/
01:04 (@Devar) i even applied for an E*TRADE account on the net >_
01:05 (NeGz) I don't like shopping elsewhere -_-
01:05 (@Devar) mind you i dont have the $1000 minimum to actually OPEN it
01:05 (@Devar) but who cares :D
01:05 (Ultima84) I bought crap off eBay :|
01:05 (NeGz) I've got no car, so going places that aren't on the train line is TME
01:05 (@Devar) hehe NeGz yeah
01:06 (NeGz) should post this convo to slashdot -_-
01:06 (@Yavin) +5 insightful
01:07 (@Devar) haha NeGz go for it, edit it correctly and it'd probably be modded up since its in context LOL
01:08 (NeGz) bags the karma :P

Re:God forbid

[Anonymous Coward]

wait till they find out windows 2000 server has telnet! the sky is falling the sky is falling!

Re:God forbid

[pilgrim23]

I am SO grateful! Here I was on efnet hanging on #linuxhelp. To THINK of the potential danger I was in...

The head of the BSA is F'd up

[Anonymous Coward]

"I.R.C. is where you are going to find your 'elite' level pirates,'' said John R. Wolfe, director for enforcement at the Business Software Alliance, a trade group that fights software piracy. "If they were only associating with each other and inbreeding, maybe we could coexist alongside them. But it doesn't work that way."

I direct the readers attention to the quote in the above: "If they were only associating with each other and inbreeding, maybe we could coexist alongside them." ...

So, people on IRC need sex0r each other, and the fedz will leave 'em alone, right?

Re:Just saw a discussion in #hackers...

[Nobody You Know]

And the damndest thing is, that compiles under Perl...

Re:God forbid

[Ykant]

Next thing you know they're going to be finding UPS liable for shipping boxes of contraband information.

Quiet, man - I need my cigars!

Re:Such a discovery!

[xgamer04]

It's always the Finns who program the cool stuff :P

Re:God forbid

[AmoebafromSweden]

>Time to go kill some puppies and take pictures >and post them in #MurderedPuppies.

Great idea!

I'll join you there!

Re:How to do it, dammit

[tkw954]

"assume a spherical cow"

-10 marks for incomplete assumptions. I think you mean "assume a spherical cow in a vacuum".

Re:God forbid

[waveclaw]

Police, FBI and other law enforcement agencies seize computer equipment *all the time*.
[snip]
The police who arrive at the office/your house/whatever know what computers look like, and might have one 'expert' with them, but they will never just take copies of your data, they will take whole machines, even whole networks.


Hmmmm...

If a computer has had kiddy porn on it, they typically destroy the computer.

So, the key is to get a bunch of old, empty 486 boxen for a font job and build your cases out of non-computer like stuff. Funiture. Lamps. Microwaves.

Cops come in a size everything 'computer like' while you hide the power cord running into your wi-fi enabled lay-z-boy.

I guess Extreme Case modding can pay off.