Microsoft Dislikes Nations Trying to Escape Lock-in 616
Johnny Mnemonic writes "Reuters, link to C|Net, is reporting that Microsoft considers a possible collaboration among three Asian nations to produce their own OS "unfair". You just can't make this stuff up. Shouldn't Asian nations also have the Freedom to Innovate? Or is this merely a dodge by Microsoft to demonstrate that they really do face competition? Will they hire Boies to prosecute their case?"
of course not (Score:5, Funny)
Of course not; Microsoft likes to be in that position
SCO executives must be jubilant (Score:5, Funny)
Mmmmmmm...
Microsoft's only comeback I can think of is that, at least, they patented ones and zeroes [theonion.com].
Oh... (Score:5, Funny)
Boies (Score:5, Funny)
Or will they hire Rumsfeld?
Re:It is a bit unfair... (Score:3, Funny)
Microsoft: victims of unfairness (Score:5, Funny)
So please, try to understand their side -- those poor, misunderstood folks in Redmond need your support. Really.
It hurts their feelings when we make fun of them, and talk about the methods they use to achieve their goals in unkind ways.
C'mon, lighten up. They're good guys.
</not>
Re:It is a bit unfair... (Score:4, Funny)
Re:MS Wants its "peers" to agree? (Score:2, Funny)
Re:There is no comparison, Keanu (Score:5, Funny)
Bill's got you guys working Saturdays, now?
Shit, I feel kind of guilty. Maybe if I acted like I believed your astroturfing bullshit during the week, he'd give you a day off every now and then.
Follow up news: (Score:5, Funny)
The Microsoft Corporation recently bought themselves the USS Enterprise (The aircraft carrier) and rechristened it to the MSCACDOTNET (Microsoft Certified Aircraft Carrier Dot NET ) "William Gates the Third". Latest US satelite intel indicated the ship, along with several other recent MS aquired warships due to a sneaky clause in the license for Windows 2003 .NET server for the US navy, were last seen heading toward the Pacific. Among the ships are the MSACDOTNET William Gates the Third, the 'boomer' submarines MSC Alabama and MSC Red October along with a small flotilla of surface warships and a large convoy of freighters with Win 2k3 .NET licenses, all heading for an unknown destination.
In other news, Denzel Washington and Sean Connery have been flogged with a wet towel.
It's so funny! (Score:2, Funny)
Hey, wait! But people in asia aren't americans..
woops, microsoft propaganda got a error and will try to restart.
You know, that "unamerican" think sounded very very bad for people who are not from US as me (Brazil), and looked a lot like emotional blackmail.
The best quote from the article... (Score:1, Funny)
Noticably absent is Microsoft. I guess they aren't concerned about security!
Eh. (Score:1, Funny)
Japan has Ninja. China has, well, they have Jackie Chan. I don't know what Korea has, but I'm sure it's something good.
Microsoft has no chance to survive; make their time.
This pussyfooting business is making me sick (Score:2, Funny)
It used to be that countries would declare war on each other because of petty rivalries between dukes and princes. Now, it sometimes takes an act of god to get them to go at it. How stupid is that?!?!
We're spending billions of dollars (a big chunk of our GDP) on national defense. And we never even use it! We shuffle our troops from base to base, sure, and we log our mileage and tally our days in service and hang our medals. But do we ever do anything productive? Do we ever kill anyone? Of course not.
Is it because we can't anymore? Bullshit. It's because we're afraid to. It's because we've let ourselves get castrated by the liberal media and their doomsday predictions about what might happen if one nation accidentally steps on the toes of the other.
Are we the world's largest superpower or what?!?! Is Bush to big a chump or is he just a pansy?!?!
If we don't start declaring open war on countries that disrespect our sovereignty, then foreign countries will think they can get away with pissing us off. Can you imagine FDR or Eisenhower letting the Chinese hold our American soldiers hostage like this? We haven't seen crap like this since Jimmy Carter, and let me tell you, those were some pretty sad days.
We must settle for no less than outright war. They think they have the upper hand now, but wait until we give it to them old-fashioned American style. They probably don't even have all those nukes they keep whispering about. Have we ever seen them detonate one? Well have we? NO! They don't exist.
Once open war is declared, our economy will boom. It'll be the answer to our recent economic downturn. Look at how WW2 pulled us out of the Depression. And look at how much more expensive modern equipment is. More expenses mean more contribution to our economy and our GDP. That means more funding for the military. It's a positive feedback loop.
And when we're done with China, we should go back to the USSR and show those guys what we're made of. We never bombed them for the U2 incident all those years ago, so it's time we showed them what for. That's what distinguishes the men from the Canadians.
Re:Gee... there must be an election somewhere near (Score:2, Funny)
lightbulb (Score:5, Funny)
Q:How many Microsoft programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A:None, they get Bill to declare darkness to be the international standard
Dude... (Score:3, Funny)
I so care about the opinion of a random nobody on the internet. Really.
Re:Funniest line in the article: (Score:5, Funny)
Get this man a cookie!
Re:Microsoft tantrums (Score:3, Funny)
So, you think the asian governments are going to pay to produce millions of software CDs and flood the U.S. market with them? Seems far-fetched to me.
heh (Score:4, Funny)
That must be some ugly source code, it seems like they got a look that and ran like hell.
Perhaps I am too close to Redmond... (Score:3, Funny)
Re:Follow up news: (Score:5, Funny)
Correction - Secretary of the Navy John H. Dalton admitted that the clause was not acutally sneaky. "We never actually read the EULA. We needed to install it so we just clicked 'OK'."
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Re:Follow up news: (Score:3, Funny)
My Supporting Interviews (Score:5, Funny)
Similarly, a press release from Orville Reddenbacker this morning claimed that "when you buy no-name popcorn, you're buying terrorism" and immediately demanded the abolition or bombing of all popcorn makers but them in order to defend America against this terrible low-priced threat. "The time for competition is over", the deceased Reddenbacker stated, the national anthem playing gloriously in the background, "We are an American institution now and must be protected from any loss of sales resulting from people buying other brands. Choice is the true enemy here. Remember this when you're voting, kids, there should be limits on freedom - especially the freedom to buy popcorn other than our new Maple Salmon flavored EZ-Popp(TM) Microwaveable popping corn, on sale now at better grocery stores near you."
The RIAA, MPAA, and SatelliteTV vendors all agreed. "Look, we all know that you'd all have bought all those 400,000 CDs, movies, and tv channels anyway if it weren't for piracy, so just cough up the money and we'll call off the dogs. Making 'mad money' is a guaranteed right that is protected by law since Dubya's been in power. It's the American Way. You love America, don't you? If you don't buy more stuff from us, we WILL press charges." Jack Valenti took it one step further. "These goddamn Chimese terrorisms ain't de worst part of dis trend either. What I tink we should do is outlaw 'playing outside'. Yup, jes tink about it. All dem little rats playing outside when dey could be enjoying a good movie or copy-protected Celine CD. De children is de REAL Boston Stranglers here, dose unAmerican little gooks. Wasting their lives playing outside in de goddam sun when dey could be supporting our economy? I don't understand kids dese days. De world is goin' straight to hell, I tell ya. Goddam nature. We'll sue God next, yeah, go for de REAL deep pockets." At this point, SCO's Darl McBride quickly took out a notepad and started scribbling furiously and then ran off, his villainous humpback swaying in the wind.
Despite the overwhelmingly good evidence the corporate shills of America had barfed forth, I thought I'd see if another view existed. So I sought out some elusive hippie culture leaders. When asked for his views, the uber-influential Richard Stallman said, "My name is GNU/RMS! Why can't you people get that right!" and starting making clucking noises and playing a flute like that little centaur guy off the Hercules cartoon. His arch-enemy Linus Torvalds quipped, "I don't get involved. Sorry.", dismissed us with a wave of his hand, and went back to his penguin burrito. Eric Raymond could not be reached for comment, as he has been at the gun club since July and is apparently not ever coming out until people start using Python to write device drivers.
Re:Depends on the base license (Score:3, Funny)
Even funnier... the market *has* decided! (Score:4, Funny)
Hello? I think it just did. Hint: you're not among them. (-:
Hey Microsoft! (Score:3, Funny)
This is the world's smallest violin playing "My Heart Pumps Purple Piss for You.".
Run for cover (Score:2, Funny)
Heart of Darkness (Score:4, Funny)
Split up Microsoft... (Score:4, Funny)
That's pretty PC-centric though. Lets not forget the XBOX. Split Microsoft into OS, App and Video Game Companies.
Well then there is the MS Smart Phones... so split Microsoft into OS, App, Video Games, and Mobile Phones.
Hmmm, that leaves MSN out. Hotmail and Passport too. OK then we need to split Microsoft into OS, App, Video Gaming, Mobile Phone and Internet Services.
Of course they make hardware too... Tablet PC's, Microsoft Mouse and Keyboards. So - oh this is it!
Split Microsoft into
OS, Applications, Video Gaming, Mobile Phones, Internet Services and Hardware Companies.
And do it quick before they start making Media Centers!!!