SCO Terminates IBM's Unix License

AKAImBatman writes "SCO has terminated IBM's license to use Unix code. SCO is filing for an injunction that will require IBM to cease all sale of AIX as well as accrue damages for each day IBM continues to sell AIX."

in related news...

[matt4077]

IBM has terminated sco's licence to live

the article

[smoondog]

LINDON, Utah, Jun 16, 2003 /PRNewswire-FirstCall via COMTEX/ -- The SCO(R) Group (SCO) (SCOX) , a leading provider of business software solutions ...

I think whomever wrote this press release needs to do his/her research better...

-Sean

I'm shocked.

[ceswiedler]

I'm shocked. Absolutely shocked. Why didn't they give notice? Why didn't all of the major news sources, including Slashdot, report this was coming? Never in my wildest dreams did I think that SCO would ever do something so reprehensible. I was just about to purchase OpenServer!

I depend on Slashdot to give me some advance warning, preferably several weeks worth of daily articles with 500 posts, so that I'm not blindsided by issues like this.

Put your money where your mouth is...

[DailyGrind]

I'm putting $100 on IBM to win in 8 months.

Still open:
1 month
2 months
3 months
etc...

I can see it now

[pizen]

I can see the army of lawyers in blue suits gearing up for battle right now.

Darl McBride

[Anonymous Coward]

When Darl McBride sees this, he will shit in his pants.

YOU FAIL IT!

S. Jobs

Ohh wait...

[Anonymous Coward]

wait wait wait... no it still won't do anything...
sorry mcbride...

Damages?

[Masque]

I wonder if this means I'm entitled to damages for every day I've been forced to use AIX.

I mean, c'mon, there's at least as much legal ground to stand on, and at least I can call my psychologist as a witness....

Re:Insanity!

[cHiphead]

i can feel it in the air... IBM is coming for those m'er f'ers and the aftermath will NOT be pretty. This will be like watching a squad of musketeers defend vs. 10 megaton nuke.

Re:On dear Lord

[phoenix_rizzen]

Well, they did buy Microsoft Xenix back in the late 70s or early 80s. Could be MS passed on a few stupid genes along with the source.

that has to be ...

[MORTAR_COMBAT!]

... the most masturbatory press release I have EVER read. SCO sure loves itself.

Jar Jar?

[nightsweat]

I feel like Jar Jar Binks was manipulated into proposing the lawsuit to SCO so that Gates could start the UNIX clone wars and take over as Darth Corporate.

LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!

[Shuasha]

In the red corner, we have a 130 lb mental midget with nothing in his bag of tricks. In the blue corner, we have a 1200 lb gorilla with a nice suit on.
Let's get it .... doh, it's over. :)

Leading? SCO? HAH!

[myowntrueself]

I love the way the article describes SCO as;
"a leading provider of business software solutions"

Lets just redefine 'leading' shall we?

Where i work we are very seriously working towards ridding our machine room of SCO forever.

To this end, I'm taking suggestions as to innovative and torturous ways to take a SCO Unixware box down.

Note; we will be putting Linux on the boxes after SCO is removed, so please, no suggestions that involve damage to the hardware.

Discussion With The Court Clerk

[BurritoWarrior]

Does SCO realize how many HUGE companies use AIX? I mean they MUST, right?

*SCO walks into court clerk*
SCO: "We would like to sue a corporation today."
Clerk: "Which One?"
SCO: "All of them".
*clerk collapses onto floor*

Future licenses

[Dark Paladin]

I think the big issue in question is all "future sales of AIX". That's the kicker - if IBM can't make new sales of the product, that will be as damaging to their reputation and product line as anything else out there.

That is, of course, unless a judge does something like this:

Judge: So, um, SCO, you're claiming IBM stole your code, right?

SCO: Yes, and we will defend our intellectual property to the ends of the earth, to the moon and back, to the universe -

Judge: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, can we see this source code?

SCO: Um, well, if we showed it to you, you might steal it as well.

Judge: Huh?

SCO: You're in it too - we know it! How much did IBM pay you to betray us?

Judge: Are you on drugs? I just want to see the supposed code theft -

SCO: Master betrayed us! No - Judge is our friend! Nobody's our friend!

Judge: Case dismissed.

Microsoft: But - but we licensed the code.

SCO: (Holding legal documents.) Our presssssciousssss....

The Death March Begins.

[saden1]

I hear SCO's war drums beating but I don't see any troops. Could they be hiding? I doubt it but their commanders seem to think that beating drums louder will scare of the "enemy."

I'll just grab some popcorn and hope this will be as entertaining as advertised. SCO, put on a good show will you.

SCO needs to update their PR description

[Frac]

The SCO(R) Group (SCO), a leading provider of business software solutions...

should be:

The SCO(R) Group (SCO), a leading provider of frivolous lawsuits...

Also,

About SCO

The SCO Group helps millions of customers in more than 82 countries to grow their businesses everyday. Headquartered in Lindon, Utah, SCO has a worldwide network of more than 11,000 resellers and 8,000 developers. SCO Global Services provides reliable localized support and services to partners and customers. For more information on SCO products and services, visit http://www.sco.com .

should be:

About SCO

The SCO Group helps several SCO executives in USA grow their declining SCO stock value everyday. Headquartered in Lindon, Utah, SCO has a worldwide network of more than 11,000 lawyers and 8,000 pending lawsuits. SCO Global Services provides reliable Fear, Uncertainty and Doubt to Linux and IBM partners and customers. For more information on SCO lies, damn lies and lawsuits, visit http://www.sco.com.

Leading like the sacrificial lamb...

[TheConfusedOne]

LINDON, Utah, Jun 16, 2003 /PRNewswire-FirstCall via COMTEX/ -- The SCO(R) Group (SCO) (SCOX) , a leading provider of business software solutions ...

They're leading the way for other companies who want to commit IP suicide.

Schumpter's Creative Destruction - Re:Insanity!

[leoaugust]

I guess this is what Schumpter meant by Creative Destruction.

It would of course be better if SCO is destroyed, but if IBM needs to be destroyed SO BE IT !!

I am all for a good fight !!!

P.S. I just hope Linux-spirit does not get destroyed in the uncertainity that will be spawned. What can uncertainity do? Just ask Alan Greenspan.

Thought for the Day

[Mu*puppy]

Wise man say: "Do not taunt the sumo..."

zerg

[Lord Omlette]

Dear SCO,

I would like some of what you are smoking. Please hook a brother up. Thanks in advance.

Re:Leading? SCO? HAH!

[kin_korn_karn]

1) print out the Unixware license document onto soft paper
2) eat taco bell
3) next day, wipe ass with license document
4) mail to SCO
5) profit!

Re:economic plan

[Squidgee]

Dude, dude.

You've obviously forgotten overused /. meme #405. It should be:

1.Buy someone else's IP
2.Fail economics 101
3.Sue
4.???
5. PROFIT!

Please keep this in mind next time you decide to come out from under your silly little bridge. Us big people have things to do.

And today from IBM

[SeanTobin]

Today IBM announced its filing of over 640 individual lawsuits against SCO.

The lawsuits ranged from countersuits regarding breach of contract, to unfair business practices, to acting not in the best intersts of shareholders, polluting the marketplace, unfair business practices, and illegal distribution of copywrighted materials.

IBM has also sent notices to the US and German attourney generals regarding SCO's breaches of international copyright treaties.

In the same announcement, IBM has denied that it employs ships stationed in international waters to attack and board any ship carrying SCO property.

On Tuesday, IBM plans to 'blacken the Utah sky' with paratrooping lawyers to persue the lawsuits.

More information will be released after Tuesday's paradrop.

Re:Insanity!

[dillon_rinker]

All for one! And one for AAAGGGGHHHH!!!!

Now it all makes sense.

[Anonymous Coward]

If nobody explains it in a LOTR context, I just don't get it.

Thanks.

SCO's infinite stupidity drive...

[Thud457]

I miss the ::Cue::Cat articles!

Is it so bad?

[Anonymous Coward]

In some ways, the Many is not unlike the UNN. There is a joy in working towards a collective goal, in being able to put aside the things that draw us apart and make us separate. Why do we fear the loss of our individuality so much? Man can dream, but the Many can accomplish.

Re:that has to be ...

[tuffy]

SCO sure loves itself.

It doesn't have any competition in that regard...

Nobel Prize in Computing

[jafac]

Honestly, eliminating all traces of AIX from the world is about the most noble goal I can imagine.

(Currently working a project running on AIX - transitioning to Linux)

Re:Discussion With The Court Clerk

[Cid Highwind]

Clerk: Sorry, but we keep all of our briefs, filings, dockets and other paperwork in an Oracle database on a big Aix server. Thanks to your licensing shenanigans we're not allowed to use that anymore, so I'm afraid you'll just have to wait while we drag all the old typewriters and filing cabinets up from storage!
SCO: You bastards! I'm holding this court liable for damages every minute that our filings are delayed.
Clerk: While you're waiting, you should reformat your 40,000 page complaint and 1,100 page briefs from MS word files to typed paped documents. We need those in triplicate, so you might want to send one of your lawyers out for carbon paper.

SCO's Motto...

[tds67]

..."All your 'nix are belong to us".

It's like watching a bully playing with fire

[Anonymous Coward]

And rooting for the flames. :-)

Hmm

[Fratz]

Since we have a bunch of AIX boxes, I guess now would be a good time to switch to Linux and avoid all this lawsuit stuff. Oh, wait...

Stock quotes

[schutten]

I just love the quotes at the bottom of the Cnet article:

down: SCO Group SCOX 10.93 -0.28
up: Intl Bus. Machines IBM 84.50 1.75

I guess that sums it all up...

Today's MarketWatch (tm)

[Chordonblue]

Today SCO chewed off it's own arm to spite it's torso by terminating a lucrative licensing agreement with IBM.

SCO CEO Darl McBride was quoted as saying, "In order to better leverage our technology IP and increase profits, we've decided to refuse to sell, license, or not sue anyone not directly involved with Microsoft's .NET initiative."

Heard in the Distance

[Mansing]

I was startled to hear the thundering of hooves. Having lived near Armonk, NY all my life, I had never heard such a sound before.

"What is that horrible sound?"

"That is the sound of the Black Steeds riding west from Armonk."

"The Black Steeds?"

"The Nazgul. They once were men. Now they are neither dead nor alive. They are IBM's attorneys."

Re:Damages?

[Zathrus]

Let me know... AIX's init torments me. Their linker causes grevious harm to all who are exposed to it, and should be considered a WMD. The C++ compiler/library still doesn't implement the STL properly and fully, while combining up with the evil linker to render debuggers useless - including the massacre of gdb.

They actually paid someone to rewrite all the man pages to ensure that any useful information was expunged.

The more I use it, the more I wonder if IBM isn't adopting Linux out of a desperate desire to have an OS that doesn't just outright suck.

Honestly... if AIX is a shining example of SCO IP, then let SCO have it. The rest of the world is better off without.

Re:The Death March Begins.

[Mononoke]

I hear SCO's war drums beating but I don't see any troops.

You have to sign the NDA first before you are allowed to see them.

Re:Another URL

[rjamestaylor]

• The companies had engaged in brief but unfruitful discussions, SCO said last week.

The call, intercepted by an unnamed source, went like this:

• Operator: Thank you for calling IBM. How may I direct your call?
  SCO: Mr. Palmisano, please.
  Operator: May I tell him who's calling?
  SCO: Darl McBride, CEO of SCO
  Operator: Oh, you again. *pause* He is still not taking your call. Would you like his voice mail?
  SCO: *sigh* Sure.
  [Flush][laughter]*click*
  

Similarities...

[BrynM]

In a dark room somewhere... sometime...

Man1: We should attack now!

Man2: Yes, we have the opportunity and the target.

Man3: But what if they counter attack us?

Man1: They're so far away and too big to be maneuverable. We'll get them while they're complacent.

Man3: But they have vast resources...

Man2: But we have the element of suprise! Think of what this could do to our status!

Man3: Well, how long will it take?

Man1: It should be over quickly. They will cave when they realize our advantage.

Terrorist planning meeting, Original Japanese Pearl Harbor debriefing or SCO legal strategy meeting? You decide.

Some quotes from SCO

[borgdows]

"We are not afraid of IBM. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid... and they are condemned.
I can assure you that those villains will recognize in appropriate time in the future how stupid they are and how they have stolen OUR intellectual property.
They are not in control of anything - they don't even control themselves!""

-- SCO Minister of Information

Re:the article

[Anonymous Coward]

Have you ever been to Lindon, UT? Their reality is a bit different from yours and mine.

SCO Reveals Stolen Code

[Eberlin]

After a lot of overhyped anticipation, SCO finally released all of the offending code. It seems that SCO had patented the symbol combinations "/*" and "*/" as well as "//" -- thus proving correct that the comments were obviously stolen code.

They are currently trying to get the courts to uphold their patent of the semi-colon, a pair of parentheses, curly braces, and the crlf combination.

SCO has also filed a lawsuit against a 14yr old California student whose "Hello World" program infringes on SCO's patents. The student could not be reached for comments.

Re:don't miss the McBride interview...

[Tackhead]

> CNET also has an extensive interview with SCO CEO Darl McBride [com.com], who is now claiming that there are "hundreds of thousands of lines" of infringing code in Linux. Choice quote: "The world seems to be divided into two camps - those that respect intellectual property and those that don't."

Lou "Agent Blue" Gerstner to Darl "Retro" McBride: "It seems that you have been living two lives, Mister McBride. One of these lives - has a future. The other - does not. Oh, who the fuck am I kidding. We're going to pound your balls flat with a mallet."

A Slashdot First

[fobbman]

This has got to be the first time in Slashdot history that the Slashdot communty has hoped that a 900 pound corporate gorilla will turn a smaller Linux-related business into a fine red mist.

Re:Insanity!

[Tenebrious1]

The National Weather Service is using AIX for some of their weather modeling. What do they do, just cease operations for a few months while they port their software...

They could stick their heads out the window and say "it looks like rain, better bring your umbrella"

Comment removed

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:Future licenses

[robsimmon]

SCO: Yes, and we will defend our intellectual property to the ends of the earth, to the moon and back, to the universe

are any of these guys Scientologists?

Re:Now it all makes sense.

[chiddiscokid]

I have to rely on the Dukes of Hazzard [arie.org]

SCOX

[Alakaboo]

(To the tune of "Lola" by The Kinks)

I met them in a club down in Santa Cruz
where you code in C and it looks just like the Linux kernel... K-E-R-N Kernel

They walked up to me and asked me to desist
I asked them their name and in a cowardly voice they said, "SCOX"... S-C-O-X SCOX, sco sco sco sco-X

Well I'm not the world's most intelligent guy
But when they showed me the code I almost cried
Oh my SCOX, sco sco sco sco-X

Well I'm not dumb but I can't understand
How they stay in business with blood on their hands
Oh my SCOX, sco sco sco sco-X

Well they filed their claims and sued all night,
thanks to Microsoft's failing might
They picked me up and sat me on their knees
Saying, "Linux coder won't you turn and flee?"

Well I'm not the world's most logical guy
And when I looked at the comments
I almost fell for their bullshit
bull bull bull bull-shit

sco sco sco sco sco-X

I laughed them away. I walked to the court.
I filed a countersuit. They'll be down on their knees.
Now that IBM is looking out for me

And that's the way that I want it to be
They'll clean them out and make them pay
Oh my SCOX, sco sco sco sco-X

Linux will be UNIX, and UNIX will be Linux
It's a scratched-out, messed-up, crazy diagram
thanks to SCOX. sco sco sco sco-X

Well I posted to LKML just a week before
saying I never ever leaked code before
SCOX smiled and said "We understand,"
saying, "Linux coder, you can do what you can"

Well I'm not the world's most open source guy
but I know Richard Stallman and I bet that they'll fry
oh my SCOX, sco sco sco sco sco-X

sco sco sco sco-X

SCO Business Plan

[appleLaserWriter]

1) Aim shotgun at foot
2) Pull trigger
3) ???
4) PROFIT!!!

IBM got its start providing IT services to the US Census beureau over 100 years ago. Today it is tightly integrated into the business and government fabric of nations around the world. IBM hires the best and brightest MBA and Law school grads every year into their corporate ranks. With that combination of inteligence and connectivity, IBM is not a force you want to fight directly.

Beginning this year, IBM has appointed a new Chairman [eweek.com]. Mr. Palmisano has a history [com.com] of supporting [midrangeserver.com] Linux [eweek.com].

This is all the motivation IBM needs to finish migrating its non-x86 platforms all the way over to Linux and completely dumping that antiquated "Unix" stuff.

I see a lot of job opportunities for Linux hackers opening up at IBM shortly. Especially for people with both Linux and IBM mainframe or PPC experience.

Re:don't miss the McBride interview...

[Taldo]

I understand the position of 'Information Minister, State of Iraq' is open....

Re:Are there even that many lines of code?

[Anonymous Coward]

So then hundreds of thousands of all whitespace lines would sound about right then...

Wow...they are all 100% identical to SCO's code! That's amazing!

Albert Einstein on the SCO case

[Anonymous Coward]

Albert Einstein is well known for his unified field theory hypothesis. He has a lesser known theory about stupidity: "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

Although we've never been able to prove the unified field theory, it looks like SCO is proving us the proof that Einstein was right about stupidity being infinite.

Their 30 seconds are up

[Anonymous Coward]

...they're starting to remind me of a little dog that won't stop humping your leg. It's sort of amusing for the first 30 seconds or so, but after awhile you just need to give them a nice kick in the head.

Re:I can see it now

[Tenebrious1]

I can see the army of lawyers in blue suits gearing up for battle right now.

Hmm... I can see the next project at IBM being a supercomputer capable of playing an intricate game that requires thinking ahead many moves to counter opponent's moves... it'll be called "Deep Tort".

Re:Poor way of phrasing it

[black mariah]

I'm glad compilers aren't that terse. Think you could split hairs just a wee bit more there?

Monty Python and the Holy Grail

[Twilight1]

This whole FiaSCO has me both entertained and worried. Common sense suggests that SCO is about to become a greasy spot on the bottom of IBM's shoes. However, in the US, common sense is barred from court rooms, and SCO could turn out to be a bigger thorn than anyone imagined.

But... I can't help being reminded of Monty Python and the Holy Grail... where SCO is playing the role of the Black Knight [stone-dead.asn.au].

- Twilight1

The reason IBM has been sitting on their thumbs

[dacarr]

IBM has been, as far as we can tell, sitting on their thumbs.

While I can't say this with full authority, I don't think they really are merely doing nothing about this. What I think they are doing right now is digging out a certain Nancy Sinatra song, looking in their closet for a particular pair of boots, and designing exactly how they are going to stomp all over SCO.

Re:Future licenses

[Anonymous Coward]

Having used AIX from version 1.0 I can say
that destroying all copies is not necessarily
a bad thing.

Re:Another URL

[orthogonal]

The call, intercepted by an unnamed source, went like this:

Operator: Thank you for calling IBM. How may I direct your call?

I saw this and assumed it would go more like this:

Operator: We get signal.
Captain: What!
Operator: Main screen turn on.
Captain: It's You!!
SCats: How are you gentlemen!!
SCats: All your AIX are belong to us.

Re:Leading? SCO? HAH!

[dacarr]

To this end, I'm taking suggestions as to innovative and torturous ways to take a SCO Unixware box down.

Might I suggest going here [toxiccustard.com] and learning how to ruin a VCR? You can apply the same exercises to a SCO box.

Re:AT&T may be getting in volved as well.

[hendridm]

> I wonder what rights AT&T retained.

The right to remain silent.

Actually...

[kikta]

Does anybody else get the impression that Big Blue is going to give SCO a bloody nose over this whole thing?

No, I'm picturing something more along the lines of a gangland-style knee-capping, followed by SCO pleading for their lives, followed by a slit throat and ritual dis-embowlment.

But that's just me. And I'm sick. ;-)

Seriously, IBM's most likely not going to let SCO live. They're going to make an example of them.

RIAA: Watch and learn

[Cloud K]

At the risk of sounding off-topic... doesn't this seem very familiar?

-- Some idiot organisation who were successful once but are no longer relevant start worrying about their future. --

-- In a feeble but desparate attempt to boost finances and publicity, they start throwing lawsuits around. --

-- Getting more and more frustrated, they start screwing their own customers, who are now getting very pissed off. --

-- Most people agree that said organisation are a bunch of a-holes and vow never to buy from them again. --

Ring any bells? If you ask me, this SCO business is like a smaller and faster-moving example of the behaviour and imminent consequences of a certain irrelevant organisation known as the RIAA.

Here's the next part, which I hope will happen to SCO and set an example to the rather slower moving RIAA case.

-- Organisation becomes obsolete and goes down the pan where it belongs. There is much rejoicing. --

Perhaps I'm stating the obvious, but it seemed uncanny to me. Watch and learn, fools...

Re:don't miss the McBride interview...

[Daniel Dvorkin]

I understand the position of 'Information Minister, State of Iraq' is open....

"White House Press Secretary" seems equally applicable.

Re:Insanity!

[Dolly_Llama]

This will be like watching a squad of musketeers defend vs. 10 megaton nuke.

That's what I'm worried about. How many times have my battleships been sunk by friggen musketeers? sheesh...

Re:Future licenses

[schon]

that has to be the ballsiest thing I've heard since I tried to make out with my girlfriend

Dude, if they make noise, you should see a doctor. :o)

Re:who owns SCO?

[Elwood P Dowd]

IBM should offer to buy SCO for $4. When they say, "That makes no sense! SCO is trading for $10!" IBM's obvious response will be:

"No. $4. Not $4 per share."

You know. Pull an Ellison on them.

Re:Another URL

[Anonymous Coward]

I was under the impression that they wanted to cut off future sales, but all past sales too? The insanity never ends at SCO.

... and in other news, Bill Gates hires Darl McBride and his legal team to declare all prior sales and/or use of any other OS illegal. An addendum was also signed stating that all analog devices are violating Microsoft's IP. You will no longer be licensed to use a "Notepad" (tm) with an analog stylus.

Headline is erroneous -- article is a troll

[Anonymous Coward]

SCO does not have the ability to "terminate IBM's Unix license". Therefore, headline should have read, perhaps:

• SCO Claims to Terminate IBM's Unix License
• SCO Pretends to Terminate IBM's Unix License
• SCO Hallucinates Terminating IBM's Unix License
• Slashdot Troll Wearing SCO Mascot Suit "t3rm1n4t3z" Innocent Plushie Wearing "IBM" T-Shirt
• State Og Terminates Kitten Named "IBM"
• Journalists Laugh at Fleischer, Al-Saif, McBride
• SCO Chief Makes "All Your Base" Joke
• SCO Chief Barks Like Dog, Humps Furniture
• SCO Chief Consumes Ordure; Terminates Self
• SCO Chief Writes Bad Eminem Parody About Self
• SCO Chief Throws Tantrum, Feces; Makes Noise Like "Warcraft III" Orc Peon
• IBM Response: "OMG WTF LOL !1!"

Re:Are there even that many lines of code?

[Delirium Tremens]

a quick import into Excel says that the sum of column B is 3,629,673

You could also pipe the whole thing and spool it so that it prints one line per page. Then you can count how many times you have to reload your printer tray and estimate how many sheets it can hold on average.

More seriously now, why on Earth would you use Excel to count the number of lines? Especially when you have a Linux command prompt ...

Re:Insanity!

[Cliffy03]

Otherwise known as the Les Nessman "Eyewitness Weather" forcast.

Re:Insanity!

[LostCluster]

B-6, B-7, B-8, and B-9.

That should sink your battleship.

ALL IBM is doing is

[geekoid]

standing in their corner, wathcing with there deadly blue eyes, as SCO prances around like an idiot.
When the bell rings, IBM will calmly walk to the center of the ring, and rip SCOs spine out.

Re:Insanity!

[hrieke]

On the plus side, as I understand it, MS uses AIX and AS/400 to manage their accounting.

Re:A Slashdot First

[llywrch]

You mean you've never encountered a yapping miniature poodle that you wanted to turn into a fine, red mist?

Geoff

Re:IN SOVIET RUSSIA...

[Anonymous Coward]

sco% advent

Welcome to Adventure!

> threaten linux_users
You get a lot of press. A group of angry penguins can be seen gathering torches in the distance.

> examine penguins
None of them are actually doing anything much that would interfere with your plan.

> threaten ibm
You get a lot more press.

> threaten ibm_customers
You get even more press.

> examine ibm
Looks like you made a mistake. More lawyers than you can shake a stick at are headed your way.

> beat ibm lawyers
That is not an option.

> kill ibm lawyers
Come now, don't be ridiculous.

> xyzzy
That doesn't work here.

The IBM lawyers have caught up with you. Your company is bankrupt, and sharks are considering revoking their offers of professional courtesy towards your employees.

You scored 0 of 357 possible points.

Re:Pissing in the Well

[Anonymous Coward]

"And the developer comments are exactly, 100 percent the same."

I.e. non-existent.

Re:Insanity!

[mattsucks]

!)@#!&^)!@#) Coastal Fortress

Re:Another URL

[Salo2112]

Damn, my RS/6000 just stopped working today. Oh wait, no it didn't. Tough luck, Darl. Your back is going to snap like the shell of a cockroach getting crushed when IBM gets done with you. You'll be *begging* to be used as currency in the prison cigarette trade before this is over.

Tomorrow on Slashdot:

[Picass0]

IBM Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:30AM
from the lets-get-ready-to-rumble dept.

AT&T Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:31AM
from the it's-an-ambush! dept.

FSF Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:32AM
from the wouldn't-be-a-party-without-us dept.

Apple Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:33AM
from the just-like-an-*ssrape dept.

Novell Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:34AM
from the opps-they-aint-lying dept.

Linus Torvalds Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:35AM
from the ELVIS-HAS-ENTERED-THE-BUILDING dept.

Redundant

[El]

So now SCO is saying "All your [code] base are belong to us!"

Shock and Awe in Lindon, UT

[Colonel Panic]

Wolf Blitzed: "This is Wolf Blitzed reporting from a Motel 6 on the outskirts of Lindon, Utah. We've been awaiting IBM's 'shock & awe' campaign against SCO for several days and now it appears to have begun. We've witnessed several cruising lawyers land near the SCO headquarters. Thousands of para-lawyers are now filling the air and landing near and surrounding SCO headquarters. The sound of paper shuffling is now almost deafening in this small Utah town. The insane dictator, Darl McBride has not been seen in the last few days and rumor has it that he is hiding in the vast bunkers under SCO headquarters. Even so, he has continuted to issue bizarre press releases claiming to not only own the rights to Unix now, but also Mac OSX, PacMan, Donkey Kong and all dirivitives of those works. BZZT...SSSHH..."
CON News Anchor: "Wolf! Are you still there?..." silence "Blitzed! Are you all right?... Well ladies and gentlemen, we appear to have lost contact with our correspondent in Lindon, Wolf Blitzed."
Wolf Blitzed: "I'm OK. Repeat, I am OK. The IBM lawers are now so thick in this area that they're blocking our transmissions. One of them just came through my room and threatened to sue me until I managed to convince him that I was a member of the press - he thought I was a hiding SCO officer. I am going to have to sign off now so I can get to a more secure area... This is Wolf Blitzed CON News, Lindon, Utah...."
CON News Anchor"Ok, Wolf. Keep your head down, and whatever happens, don't sign any NDAs."

Re:Future licenses

[ClosedSource]

IANALEAIDPOOTV (I Am Not A Lawyer Either And I Don't Play One On TV) but ...

Re:Another URL

[formercalderian]

I think it is pretty funny to see all this hype going on about SCO filing suits against IBM when they still have IBM listed as one of their strategic partners on their website! Oh, and they also still have UnitedLinux listed as a partner too. As usual, it appears that the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing at SCO (Caldera). I emailed them and asked them about this, typical response from SCO...they didn't respond.

Next Day???

[donutz]

1) print out the Unixware license document onto soft paper
2) eat taco bell
3) next day, wipe ass with license document
4) mail to SCO
5) profit!


You wait till the next day? You must be eating gourmet taco bell or something.

We are in control

[Anonymous Coward]

OHIO, June 16 (Reuters) - SCO Group (Nasdaq:SCOX) today rebutted the response of International Business Machines Corp. (NYSE:IBM - News) to its earlier injunction against the continued use of its AIX software, a version of Unix. SCO CEO Darl C McBride was quoted today as saying "There are no lawyers in IBM! Do not believe them!". Asked if he thought IBM would defeat them in court, he continued, "Let them come. They are most welcome. We will welcome them with bullets and shoes. We will destroy all AIX installations, most of them!". IBM was not available for comment.

Re:Albert Einstein on the SCO case

[TheRaven64]

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
...it looks like SCO is proving us the proof that Einstein was right about stupidity being infinite.

Maybe. Strong evidence certainly, but no one has actually proven that SCO's laywers are human...

Re:Insanity!

[TheRaven64]

I think you might be thinking of ICBM. The one SCO's suing is the one without the C, although only slightly less dangerous...

Re:Warning! Warning!

[Anonymous Coward]

1. a_0 <=> true
2. a_n => a_n+1
3.???
4. SCO is stupid!

Re:Insanity!

[marko123]

B1 and B2. That should sink your Bananas in Pyjamas.

Re:Tomorrow on Slashdot:

[DrNibbler]

You forgot RMS Sues SCO
Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday June 17, @08:36AM
from the you-should-have-said-GNU/LINUX-in-you-briefs dept.

Easy joke.

[Captain Nitpick]

are any of these guys Scientologists?

Pretty sure they're a pack of mormons actually.

You've got an extra letter in there.

I wish I had licensed a copy of AIX

[Tsu Dho Nimh]

If only so I could tell SCO to get lost.

Announcing that they are voiding licenses that were bought in good faith, bought at a time when SCO and IBM were partners, boggles the mind.

Re:Insanity!

[Anonymous Coward]

Hey I like your new word, 'emitome.' can I license it for non-commercial use?

but what does it mean?