Half-Squid, Half-Octopus Discovered Off of Hawaii

Otter writes "A unique creature that's been dubbed an 'octosquid' with eight arms and a squid-like mantle, was discovered off Hawaii. The creature, of a previously unknown species, was trapped in the net covering a 3,000 foot-deep intake tube for the Natural Energy Laboratory of Hawaii Authority. From the article: 'The octosquid was pulled to the surface, along with three rattail fish and half a dozen satellite jellyfish, and stayed alive for three days. According to War, the lab usually checks its filters once a month, but this time, it put a plankton net in one of the filters and checked it two weeks later. The pitch-black conditions at 3,000 feet below sea level are unfamiliar to most but riveting to scientists who have had the opportunity to submerge. The sea floor is full of loose sediment, big boulders and rocks, and a lot of mucuslike things floating in the water, which are usually specimens that died at the surface and drifted to the bottom.'"

Half squid, half octopus

All delicious!

Re:

DNA analysis reveals it's an ocean-going descendent of the ManBearPig genus. Scientists are afraid to speculate what it tastes like, but Wal-Mart shoppers probably will know that soon.

Re:Half squid, half octopus

That's garbage. People who shop at Wal-Mart can't afford sea food.

Re:Half squid, half octopus

It won't be *labeled* as seafood...

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Either way, I won't mess with one. I hear that they are armed to the teeth.

Re:Half squid, half octopus

I hear that they are armed to the teeth.

Worse than that: they're toothed to the arm.

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In any case, I wonder if it will taste more like calamari, or octopus.

What I want to know is: when it was caught, did it shout "It's a trap!" ?

Taningia danae

There have been 8 armed squid described before including the Taningia danae species [tolweb.org] by the same scientists, though our understanding of these animals is poor at best. Though I have to say I am puzzled as to why the Octosquid was assigned to the Mastigoteuthidae genus other than it seems to be a catchall genus for weird squid species that we do not know much about...

Oh and hey Otter [slashdot.org]! What's up dude? I actually had no idea these guys were in Kona. Had that been known, I would have visited last time I was there [utah.edu].

Re:Octosquid is here

Now that octosquid is here, could the OctoParrot be far behind?

Re:Octosquid is here

Four heads, four tails, and all dead. I'm telling you this octoparrot is no more. It has ceased to be.

Re:Octosquid is here

Now that octosquid is here, could the OctoParrot be far behind?

Don't even ask about octopussy. See, I thought that was a fucking brilliant idea when I was a kid, it'd be a cat but with eight fluffy bendy legs that are like tails they can walk on. It would be unusual but cute. And then I found out that pussy was another name for a vagina and the image got a whole lot more terrifying. Even later, I found out about Japanese tentacle monsters and figured this must be what the lady tentacle monsters would look like.

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You probably flew right by them, probably even saw them and wondered what the buildings were. They are right next to the airport, between it and the ocean. Besides the airport, ain't nothing else around for miles except a sea of black lava. They aren't

Natural

It all looks the same in the dark.

We need patent reform!

That way, scientists will be able to patent valuable genes in our half-squid/half-octopus brethern, as opposed to killing them to protect their trade secrets

Stupid Name

They have been calling it an OctoSquid. I have to say, I dislike that. I would prefer that they call it a Squidopus!

Also, it looks a lot like a weird Japanese sex toy.

Re:Stupid Name

It needs about 30 more tentacles to count as Japanese sex toys.

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I like SQUOCTOPUS!

Re:Stupid Name

They should call it Cmdr Tako

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"a weird Japanese sex toy." This statement implies that are normal Japanese sex toys, which as far as I can tell, isn't the case.

OMG! An old one!

IE! IE! Microsoft fthagn!

Damnit

Kids left the gate open again.

It moved!

Quick! Poke it with a stick!

You just know trhat they wanted

to call it the 'Squidpus'

But....

Does it have frickin' lasers?

Imagine

A Beowulf cluster of these...

And no it does not run Linux, even though is has base 8.

And it would sure fuck with the iphone's multi-touch interface.

Woo! I love it!

Inter-species tentacle porn!!!

Re:

Isn't all tentacle porn inter-species? Or are there actually some sick fucks in this world who actually like watching tentacle monsters raping other tentacle monsters?

Neon Meate Dream Of A Octafish

Captain Beefheart could not be reached for comment.

Title is wrong

This is not "half squid, half octopus". This is a squid with eight arms that is no more related to octopuses than any other sort of squid.

Squids and octopuses are far too far apart to breed.

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I haven't RTFA, but they could be saying that it's one of those creatures from a lineage 'in between' squids and octopuses. Not that it's a descendant of a squid/octopus mating, but rather is a descendant from a common ancestor of squids and octopuses, one

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Huh. Apparently pointing out that one should read what the article says before making claims about what the authors mean is a "troll", while speaking through ignorance is not. Yay slashdot, website of people who don't bother to find out.

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I grew up in NoVA myself. What you saw were probably cave crickets:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cave_cricket [wikipedia.org]

They love drainpipes, sheds and dark basements. They are quite spider-like and get rather big and nasty looking. But there's no way they wove web

Re:Title is wrong

That appears to be a cave cricket, family Rhaphidophoridae.

They do not weave webs, that I am aware of, and the particular species that infests my house do not chirp. Furthermore, they move very differently from most large spiders - they rarely move more than a foot without hopping at least some, and they can hop about two feet maximum. In a somewhat interesting(in an evolutionary sense) instinct, they often hop towards motion, which combined with their tendency to lie completely still afterward, presumably throws off cave predators better than hopping away.

Oh, dear.

As someone with a deathly fear of squid *and* octopus I have to say that it really feels like Satan and Mother Nature have decided to tag-team together in an all-out effort to make my darkest nightmares become incarnate. Next week they'll find a jellysquidfishapus and I'll end up like one of those H.P. Lovecraft characters who sees the most horrible thing possible and just dies on the spot.

I'll miss you guys.

Re:Oh, dear.

A deathly fear of squid and octopus?

Well, I hate to mention this, but if you're serious, don't look up Vampyroteuthis infernalis [wikipedia.org]. Like this one from Hawaii, which looks somewhat similar, it is a deep red color and lives in the deep sea. Vampyroteuthis is also known as the "vampire squid" [tolweb.org], it shares traits of both squid and octopods (another similarity), and its body is (wait for it) described as having "the consistency of a jellyfish". So, it sounds rather close to the "jellysquidfishapus" you imagine in your nightmares. Sorry. It looks like it exists already. If it's any consolation, it's small (max. 13cm long).

Re:Oh, dear.

*thud*

Re:Oh, dear.

"He wouldn't stop and write 'thud', would he?"
"Maybe he was dictating?"
"Oh, shut up."

Re:Oh, dear.

This is drifting off topic, but I looked up that intriguingly-named creature.

The wiki says it was discovered by "German teuthologist Carl Chun"

"teuthologist Carl Chun"?

It took the anagram server about 0.1 seconds to come up with 'Cthulhu great colonist' from that one. So you might want to take those nightmares a little more seriously, mate.

(That or Cthulhu Scrotal Toeing which hints at truly blasphemous levels of hentai...)

Who cares how it came to be...

I just wanna know, how does it taste!? I can't wait to try me some octomari!! Or is it calapus?

Plan 10!

Greetings, my friend. We are all interested in biological life, for that is how you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember my friend, biological creatures such as these will affect you as a creature.

You are interested in the unknown... the mysterious. The unexplainable. That is why you are here. And now, for the first time, we are bringing to you, the full story of what happened on that fateful day. We are bringing you all the evidence, based only on the secret testimony, of the miserable souls, who survived this terrifying ordeal.

The incidents, the places. My friend, we cannot keep this a secret any longer. Let us punish the guilty. Let us reward the innocent. My friend, can your heart stand the shocking facts of octosquids from the deep ocean?

Another photo

Here's another article [hawaiitribune-herald.com] with a more close-up photo. Does anybody else hear a slithering voice saying "The Stars Are Right" when you look into its ever-so-hypnotic eye?

Holy Shit!

This has got to be the worst nightmare of every sexy, busty teenage green- or pink-haired schoolgirl, ninja, and swordswoman in Japan!

GMD

half squid, half octopus...

ALL COP!

...and It's red because...

TFA fails to explain a curious trait of deep-sea beasties like this. They're red because in very low light conditions, red appears black - good camouflage in an inky abyss. Red pigment is much easier for creatures to synthesize than black.

Octsquidman

Half octopus, half squid, half man. I'm so serial!

8 arms???

...with eight arms...

I hate to get into the technobabble nonsense, but I think they're called tentacles (or testicles, if you're a pretty, French foreign-exchange student).

I was really drunk in Hawaii a year ago...

I remember an underwater nightclub, a squid bachelorette party, lots of dancing, some blow...

Oh shit.

life imitating cartoons

was there a kitchen sponge living in a pineapple found nearby?

Re:life imitating cartoons

Sorry, Squidward only has 6 legs (4 legs and 2 arms really).

I'm ashamed that I know that.

Re:Conversation overheard in a Squid bar

Squid Chick #1: You gotta watch out for those octopus guys.

SQ #2: Yeah, I hear they have hands like an octo ... hey!