Krystlstorm's Journal: Medicine dependency, feeling normal, and finals.

Well I was just now getting used to the fact that I have to take synthroid until the day I die. Though they can't seem to get my dose right and I am starting to get tracks on my arm from the blood tests, I swear people must think I shoot up. Now after a solid month of having a worse then normal fight with my inner self I finally decided to go see a doc. More meds! Now I am on Lexapro to get my head right, no idea for how long though, and Lorazapam to help me sleep, but at least that is just through finals. Thing is I feel different now, not normal. Normal for me is either sad or off. I have gotten really good at living in emotional off mode. So now I feel, well ok, which is totally odd. But what has me thinking is I have only been taking the meds for a week. Not sure if this is long enough to do anything. Maybe this is just some grand placebo effect. I always thought sleeping pills knock you out, so far though they just seem to make it so I don't think so much, which is great since that is why I couldn't sleep. Maybe I feel better because I am sleeping? Heck I don't know. It definitely helps with finals coming though. Sleeping that is. This is completely random and more stream of conscious then going anywhere. I cannot wait for finals to be over with. Math is really kicking my butt this semester. I don't care what the answer to 4(x power) =5(x+2 power) is. And I may have figured out how to complete the square but that doesn't mean I really care to do it. At least it is almost over; this semester has just been bad all the way around. Three more tests and I'm done till mid January. On the up side I got some Christmas cards these last couple days. It's odd I realized I have never gotten Christmas cards before, it is nice. Someday I will learn not to procrastinate on studying till the last minute. Though I have to say this is better then my first semester. I took online do it yourself math and history classes, procrastinated till the last week and did a whole semester of math including quizzes, midterm, and final in four days. Watched 8 hours of history videos and wrote 13 response papers the next night. Yay me. Never again! Well anyway hope everyone is well today. Have a good weekend. As for me I will be testing Sherlock Holmes hypothesis that if you stuff your brain with useless information other information you want to keep falls out.