So, it turns out, WalMart is the only place open at 10:15pm on a Sunday night with computer equipment. They had some 10/100 hubs (not switches, but good enough for now).
When we get home, it turns out we also need a new dial-up modem (WalMart only had internals, which I intend never to buy). But at least our LAN is back up and running.
But once again steeds.com and our other domains are down for a while (until sometime tomorrow).
Update: I forgot I had a modem in my IBM
Thinkpad. It's one of those crappy "WinModems"
that almost never work under Linux, but in this
case, IBM released drivers. Go IBM!