thelasttemptation's Journal: Friends

Damn it, what's going on?
A stranger is sitting across from me,
in the body of someone I considered a friend.

Who is this person? Who am I?
Why the hell do I cry?

I lost a friend, a friend I never had,
Today, I lost something that didn't exist.
Can you morn for a imagined feeling?
Can you cry for a stranger?

I always considered you as someone,
Someone I knew and trusted,
Now I know better,
I know that you never wanted me to.

Who is this person? Who am I?
Why the hell do I cry?

I lost a friend, a friend I never had,
Today, I lost something that didn't exist.
Can you morn for a imagined feeling?
Can you cry for a stranger?

I was always there for you,
You never wanted me to.
I was around and could be found,
You never wanted me to.
I tried to watch out for you,
You never wanted me to.
I tried to be a friend,
You never wanted me to.

Today I lost a friend,
a friend I never had.

Great Poetry

[1nsane0ne]

You are a really talented writer. The stuff you write is amazing. Of course it's a bit on the dark side and not exactly uplifting, but you generally write how you fell I guess. You just have to know that you'll make it through the tough times and then you'll enjoy the good times that much more. Keep up with the writing though, it's really good.

Re:Great Poetry

[thelasttemptation]

Thanks. Yeah, I write bout what I feel at that moment at time. and I will keep writing, as well, I enjoy it.

it happens to all of us

[SolemnDragon]

including me, and fairly recently at that, several times now.

*sigh* what's weirder is finding that the bits of me i don't know outnumber the bits of my personality that i'm familiar with.

Sometimes i wonder about the certainty of anything in this world. Sometimes, i feel so... anchorless, as if i could be swept aside so easily. As if the tides that move the world move me and i don't know it because the jumbled bits of surf move, too, and then they shift a little more and i realise that i was using them a

Re:it happens to all of us

[MousePotato]

I have had a lot of those days lately... the divorce has had me in a tail spin and then I befriended a woman and started to fall in love with her only to find out that she was not interested in me that way at all and 'just wants to be friends'. Talk about mixed signals... I could have sworn she had more feeling for me than that. I guess it has been too long since I met a woman to understand what is what these days. Heck, I haven't had to think about dating for 15 years and it all seems so wierd to me...

I g

Re:it happens to all of us

[thelasttemptation]

/me sighs.
yeah, I know what you mean. I don't know sometimes. I meet this wonderful lady and she actually liked me and thought I was cute and wanted a relationship. She really started it and whatnot. How could I fail I thought, so I really went for it. Awhile later, we sit down to talk, I just had the best week in my life, I was never happier. She told me that she doesn't like being around me cause I confuse her and am always depressed and I'm no fun to be round. I was devistated. I was *never* happier and

Re:it happens to all of us

[thelasttemptation]

Yeah, I had a moment dealing with who am I a few weeks ago. I stood there and I didn't know who I was or why I was there or anything. I don't know myself. I really don't, and I wonder if I ever will.

I was walking in the woods at the time, and I just shouted to the world, 'Who am I?' and I didn't get a answer. I just sat under a tree for a few hours thinking. I just don't have a answer, cause so much of myself is a show at times, but if you act like something for long enough, do you become what you act?

And

paradox

[SolemnDragon]

it is a part of the puzzle of being alive that we are both what moves through us and what we experience as a result- both the reflection of the outer world and our projection upon it.

I keep hoping that walking this circle will one day result in enlightenment.

Then i wonder whether maybe just knowing that it's a circle isn't some kind of enlightenment, after all...