Chicks_Hate_Me's Journal: Loneliness

It's probably the worst feeling you can have. You'd think someone like me would be used to it, and I am, but whenever I have the opportunity to be with someone, I take advantage of it, except that I latch onto that person. In most cases, that girl does not have the same feelings for me as I do for them and I end up hurting myself. Now I must return to my normal self and it sucks. For the past few weeks I have felt like going out and doing something, with anyone. Anytime I see an attractive girl, I'll all the sudden feel depressed because I know I can never be with anyone for more than a week. Now it's back to watching Family Guy episodes, whacking off to pr0n, and trying to fix things in Linux.

Not that I can really complain, these three things are the spices of life for me. Has Family Guy ever not made me laugh? No, has pr0n not made me happy? Nope. And Linux? Has Linux ever let me down? Never! If Linux was a female, it would be the perfect girlfriend. A girlfriend that is always there when you need her, and not there when you don't. You can see Linux whenever you want, just by typing ssh. Linux is not a drain on your intelligence nor your emotions, if anything, it expands your mind. Sure I may sound like a loser (which I am), but Linux is the glue that keeps my broken mind and heart together. Maybe Linux is the only thing I got?

It's sad that Linux is my girlfriend, but the more I think about it, the more I don't care and the more hatred I have for society (or so I think.) Why is it that society portrays having a significant other as a necessity? Every where you look, be it the president, TV, movies, it's always about couples. How many great movies have you seen that didn't involve a love story of some sort? (only one that I can think of, Pi) The majority of American voters would not vote for a president if he didn't have the "Family Image". Then there's all the bullshit around celebrity couples. Whenever you watch some TV Show or some movie, you'll always see some depressed guy that just got dumped by his girlfriend only to regain happiness by finding someone else. You never see some movie about a guy getting dumped and then finding the cure for cancer, nobody would watch it, it would be too boring. Maybe it's society imprinting into our pathetic brains that in order to be happy, we NEED someone. Or maybe it's animal instinct. Maybe it's instinct for males to procreate the earth with their seed to as many women as they humanly can. Maybe it's instinct for man to feel accomplished by having a family. I have no clue, and I doubt I will ever find out.