dead_puppy's Journal: A message from the CDC on Bacillis Tacosnotus Meningitis

Alternative names:

Lunix Faggotry, Katzian Slip (the multiple penetrations of Katz small organ into various mucous covered orifices of the human body)

Definition:

A disorder characterized by sudden homosexual urges and the desire to have slashdot editors ejaculate onto the sensory organs (eyes, tongue, sinus cavities) of the body. This disorder was first published by the late J.W. Troll, Esq., and the paper can be found here.

Causes, incidence, and risk factors:

Bacillis Tacosnotus Meningitis is a form of neurosnotus, which is a progressive life-threatening complication of Tacosnotus infection.

The disorder resembles syphilis. There is inflammation of the scrotum (the membranes that cover the testicles and lower penis). Tacosnotus may cause purlent discharge around the site of initial infection, as well as psychologic changes (e.g. poor grammar compounded by even worse spelling), the most prominant change being in temper (e.g. modstorming).

Bacillis Tacosnotus Meningitis affects approximately 7000 out of 550,000 slashdot readers. Risks include previous Tacosnotus infection, or previous infection with other sexually transmitted diseases such as gonorrhea (which may hide symptoms of Tacosnotus infection). Tacosnotus infections are transmitted primarily through sexual contact with a slashdot editor's infected lesions, but may be transmitted by nonsexual contact(e.g. sitting on the same toilet other slashdot editors had sat on).

Prevention:

Adequate treatment and follow-up of primary Tacosnotus infections will reduce the risk of developing Tacosnotus Meningitis.

Avoidance of Linux zealots (a common carrier of Bacillus Tacosnotus, as well as sewer rats) will reduce the risk of transmission. It is advisable that any contact with slashdot editors be done at a distance of no less than 17 feet without a special "bubble suit" to prevent air transmission. One study has shown that Bacillus Tacosnotus seems to thrive in filthy environments, such as the cubicles, homes, showers, etc. of your typical Linux user. Avoid these areas at all costs.

Another study also showed a link between hygiene (or lack of) and transmission, where a group of 24 men (11 linux users, 13 control) were placed in a dormatory environment for 38 days. All 11 of the linux users, who neglected to shower or clean their teeth during the entire duration of the study, developed advanced cases of Bacillus Tacosnotus Meningitis. The other 13, who showered regularly and maintained some form of personal cleanliness, did not contract Bacillus Tacosnotus.

Symptoms:

Pronounced homosexuality, penile tissue dessication (sometimes ending in autoamputation), prolapsed rectum, crohn's disease, fournier's gangrene, pink eye, benzodiazapine amnesia, thrush, autoerotic asphyxiation

Treatment:

Penicillin or other antibiotics such as tetracycline or erythromycin are given to treat the infection. Treatment may be prolonged to ensure that the infection is completely cleared. Symptoms may improve dramatically after treatment of the infection. A follow-up examination of the cerebrospinal fluid is required to evaluate the effectiveness of antibiotic therapy.

Linux induced sexual deviancy can be treated on an outpatient basis with psychotherapy and nongay operating systems (e.g. windows2000, mac osx, *bsd). In severe cases, a patient may be checked into a clinic for psychological deprogramming caused by open-sores and hentai exposure. In both cases, the patient is advised to avoid Linux in order to prevent a relapse of homosexual activity and/or pedo/necrophilia.

Expectations (prognosis):

Heterosexuality is possible, although unlikely. Attacks of homosexuality are common, with gayness caused directly by the neurologic damage that also occurs with late Bacillis Tacosnotus infection. People with late Bacillis Tacosnotus infections are at a greater risk for other infections and diseases.

Calling your health care provider:

Go to the emergency room or call the local emergency number (such as 911) if Tacosnotus Meningitis seizures occur. Call your health care provider if severe homosexuality with chancroids or other symptoms are present, particularly if there is a known history of Bacillis Tacosnotus infection.

This disorder can be sexuality-threatening!

Useful Links for more information about Bacillis Tacosnotus and the ancient homosexual ceremony of Tacosnotting:
Trollaxor
The WIPO Troll
dead_puppy (originator of this document)


All contents of this post are protected by the GNU license agreement.