Ethelred Unraed's Journal: The world just doesn't understand

Stargoat whines that we should have a Passenger Bill of Rights. To which I say, Harrumph!

Once again I must confess to being baffled by these half-hearted solutions to common problems, particularly when insisting on creating new lists of rights for people, when it would obviously be far simpler for the world to submit itself to my arbitrary rule. No more lawsuits (I'd just tell people to settle it themselves with weapons of their choice, starting with the lawyers), no more wailing about lack of punishment (I'd be sure to issue plenty of that), no more complaints about respecting each other's rights (because I'd make sure there are no rights, except for my own, of course)...well, you get the idea.

What's so hard to understand about that?

Bah! I'm going to retire to my lair and crush some lackeys under my heel until you fools finally get the point.

PS: Meanwhile, another anonymous person has sent me tribute in the form of a three pack of animated LOTR movies, for which we grant a lackadaisical royal wave in gratitude. See, some people around here are starting to get the point!

Ethelread vs Zod

[Tsunayoshi]

Oh imperious wanna-be world dominator, what more can you take away from me that Zod [zod2008.com] cannot?

Re:

[Ethelred Unraed]

What an impertinent question.

Everything, of course.*

You may grovel now.

Cheers,

Ethelred

* - Zod is, of course, a fictional character loosely modeled upon myself.

Re:

[iminplaya]

I can't quite place that dance move he has there [zod2008.com], and I sure hope he's not wearing tights.

Re:

[RevMike]

For one thing, Ethelred's name is harder to spell.

Re:

[Ethelred Unraed]

Hah! You are merely jealous, "Mike".

I mean, really. Has the name "Mike" ever struck terror into the hearts of millions? Would anyone have wept in quaking fear at Mike Stalin? Would James Bond ever bother with Mike Blofeld? Would Europe have quailed at the sound of the thundering hooves of the hordes of Mike the Hun? Would anyone tremble at the sight of a hungry Iron Mike Tyson fancying a snack of human ears?*

Overmightily yours,

Ethelred

* - You might. I wouldn't. I swear. Really!

Re:

[RevMike]

I triumph [wikipedia.org]

Re:

[Tsunayoshi]

Mike wins!

Of course, I am biased as I am also a "Mike". Although instead of quaking in terror at Heavenly Wrath, they usually laugh.

Re:

[Ethelred Unraed]

SILENCE!

Insurrection! Insubordination! Discombobulation! Jaywalking! Queue-jumping!

/me reaches for the lever for the trapdoor

Cheers,

Ethelred

Re:

[Ethelred Unraed]

Oh sure, trying to scare me with your namby-pamby heavenly forces of good.

Besides, I have an inside source who tells me Uriel, Raphael and Gabriel snicker at Arch-Mike behind his back anyway.

Cheers,

Ethelred

Mistaken

[Stargoat]

I do not whine, I bleat.

Why Worry About the World

[eno2001]

When I already own it? Once you have tasted the sweet nectar of omnimpotent benegnorance, you will not care what others think.