Andux's Journal: A Modest Proposal for dealing with volcanism in Yellowstone

from the cum-grano-salis dept.
Rockets.

Mount rockets at selected points on the earth's crust, and use them to move it all around so that pesky hot spot is under a region too thick for the molten rock to penetrate. It's projected to move under such a spot in a few million years or so anyway; why not accelerate the process?

Possible caveats:

• This may relocate other hot spots to more dangerous locations.
• The massive acceleration may enlarge minor or hitherto unknown faults in the earth's crust.
• Failure to produce uniform acceleration worldwide may cause tectonic plates to slam into each other and bounce around like bumper cars, triggering major earthquakes around the globe.
• It may be difficult to procure the necessary size and quantity of rockets, or to securely attach them to the crust at the appointed locations, and the huge amounts of exhaust generated may cause additional problems.
• I may not, in fact, have any idea what I'm talking about.

Discuss.