silent_rock's Journal: giving up

Well.

I keep on giving up. Every day and every night, I give up at some point. I feel like every day, I overcome one or two obstacles, when overcoming 5 or 6 would be a much more satisfactory pace.

I like to complain.

Every once in awhile, I think, boy, if I could go back to little league basketball now, I would be such a star. Yes, I think that if I played with 5th graders, I would be okay. Similarly, I think, boy, if I could go back to first year of grad school with what I know now, I would be pretty good! hah!

The Word of the Day for June 24 is:
cocooning \kuh-KOON-ing\ noun
: the practice of spending leisure time at home in preference to going out

I can remember entire summers in the past when I holed away in my sublet, reading stuff, maybe going for walks along the river, and that was the entirety of my summer. Getting to work, getting home, hiding from people. I didn't even have internet at home back then, or a cell phone. That was nice.

Something is a little off, I'm not sure what. Then again, I live most of my life with something "a little off".

I got two Kawabata books from the library, but I can't stand the translation of one of them. It's at 5th grade reading level. No flow. Maybe I'll look for a different translation. I learned that Kawabata also offed himself, by gassing, not sticking a sword in his stomach. Mishima wrote the preface to one of his books.

I cooked eggplant yesterday and it was way too salty. Must learn the subtleties of cooking.

I'm just sort of waiting for one week from now, when I fly to Wyoming to meet the fam for a National Park trip. I think that after that trip I will have a whole new (positive) outlook.

Giving up

[GP(MPK)]

Remember 5th floor ping-pong when you were on the brink of figuring everything out? The thing that supercedes all things?

Don't give up on that.

Re:Giving up

[silent_rock]

um......
a little reminder please?
all i remember discussing at 5th floor ping pong was that there is NO ABSOLUTE TRUTH in the universe....

Re:Giving up

[GP(MPK)]

Ah, right I remember. IMHO, I think it just "seems" like that there is no absolute truth in the universe, but we haven't figured it out yet. I remember you fighting this very notion of a lack of an absolute truth, ie. certainty, in anything, and maybe you aquiesced.

But we're here. The mere notion that I'm here typing this sentence predicates that there has to be a reason to everything. But I think we're not smart enough at the moment to figure it out.

But I'm not discouraged. Go science!