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It's funny.  Laugh. Sci-Fi

MST3K is Back, Sort Of 264

Polar Star writes "Retrocrush reports that Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, and Bill Corbett are back making fun of crappy movies again in a new incarnation called The Film Crew. In the first of many new DVDs to be released, they take on a 1969 abomination called Hollywood After Dark which features a still-not-very-young Rue McClanahan as a down-on-her-luck actress who becomes a stripper. Needless to say, it's one of the scariest movies you'll ever see. There's plenty of funny jokes throughout, and they definitely prove themselves worthy of carrying on the MST3K tradition." Update 1925 GMT by SM: Corrected a few oversights and pointed to The Film Crew's actual website.
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MST3K is Back, Sort Of

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  • by AugstWest ( 79042 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:00PM (#19986089)
    http://www.rifftrax.com/ [rifftrax.com]

    Download mp3s, and start them up at the same time as your DVD....
    • http://www.rifftrax.com/

      Download mp3s, and start them up at the same time as your DVD....
      Are there any players that will let you sync the audio to the video and let it work for fastfoward and pausing? That's the only problem I can see with it, be a real pain in the ass if you had to just let the damn thing run, no pausing. If I'm in an audience of a size greater than one, there will be pauses, rewinds, etc.
      • by LMacG ( 118321 )
        Remind me not to go to the movies with you.
      • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

        by smclean ( 521851 )

        Are there any players that will let you sync the audio to the video and let it work for fastfoward and pausing? That's the only problem I can see with it, be a real pain in the ass if you had to just let the damn thing run, no pausing. If I'm in an audience of a size greater than one, there will be pauses, rewinds, etc.

        The do try and make it easier to sync mid-movie by occasionally having a robot-voiced character read a line that should be synchronized with a line in the movie. This way, you *can* still start in the middle of a movie, but it is a PITA.

      • Re: (Score:2, Interesting)

        I remember MST3k as being really funny. I just watched about a dozen samples from RiffTrax and found them not very funny. Is it just me?
  • Prior work? (Score:3, Funny)

    by ArcadeX ( 866171 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:00PM (#19986095)
    Anyone have any links to prior work they've done, to know what to expect?
  • Rifftrax (Score:3, Informative)

    by WrongMonkey ( 1027334 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:00PM (#19986097)
    It's not the whole MST3K crew, but RiffTrax [rifftrax.com] have been around for a while and are extra awesome because they finally give the treatment to mainstream movies.
    • Re: (Score:2, Informative)

      I was thinking the exact same thing, then I thought, "Wait! This is a doup [slashdot.org]!" But a little checking around [dapcentral.org] would seem to show that they indeed are, all three, united in a new project. They've been The Film Crew for a while, but they seem to be jumping in on actual DVD releases now as we can see on The Film Crew's website [filmcrewonline.com] the link for which seems to be missing in the article. Still, though, this is pretty old news. I remember voting for my 'first release' several months, if not a year, back. That could've bee

    • "It's not the whole MST3K crew..."

      Whatever happened to Joel??

      Didn't he really come up with the MST3K idea, even the theme music? Why did he just disappear?

      • Re:Rifftrax (Score:5, Funny)

        by jollyreaper ( 513215 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @03:14PM (#19987057)

        Whatever happened to Joel??

        Didn't he really come up with the MST3K idea, even the theme music? Why did he just disappear?
        He got in an escape pod and made it back to Earth at the end of Mitchell. He's been keeping a low profile since then because he doesn't want the Mads to send him back.
      • Whatever happened to Joel??
        Stoned in his mother's basement I'm guessing.
      • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

        by smclean ( 521851 )

        When he left MST3K he filmed a pilot for HBO, a sketch comedy show called 'The TV Wheel'. My buddy and I were big enough fans that we went to the filming of the pilot, after being tipped off from Usenet that you could get free tickets. The show was never picked up.

        Wikipedia lists some other projects of his post-mst3k..
  • by InvisblePinkUnicorn ( 1126837 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:01PM (#19986105)
    What's everyone's favorite line from MST3K?

    Mine: "We will be approaching speeds of... 3!"
    • by Psmylie ( 169236 ) * on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:03PM (#19986147) Homepage
      Anything that mentions Zap Rowsdower.
      • "Gettin' water for Rowsdower... bippity boppity bowsdower!"

        Or the car trying to start... "RRR RRR RRR RRR ROWSDOWER!"
        • by Psmylie ( 169236 ) * on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @03:16PM (#19987091) Homepage
          I posted this a while back, but here it is again: Zap Rowsdower, Chuck Norris style!

          When Zap Rowsdower talks, people become intoxicated by the alcohol fumes from his breath
          There are no endagered animals, only animals that Zap Rowsdower hasn't eaten... yet.
          Zap Rowsdower once killed an entire cult with a single roundhouse kick. They died laughing.
          Bullets are deflected by Zap Rowsdower's hockey hair
          There is no forehead under Zap's mullet... there's another beer gut
          In the unlikely event that Canada ever runs out of beer, they can drink Zap Rowsdower's blood, which is 120 proof.
          You are what you eat, and Zap Rowsdower is 200 pounds of bacon fat
          The only force known to withstand the force of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick (tm) is Zap Rowsdower's doughy gut

          That's all I have for now... Rowsdowermobile, awaaay!!

      • by stinerman ( 812158 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:20PM (#19986379)
        Don't forget:

        Big McLargehuge
        Gristle McThornbody
        Buff Hardback
        and
        Thick McRunfast
        • Dirk Hardpeck
          Butch Deadlift
          Blast Thickneck
          Lump Beefrock

          (that's one of the greatest episodes - not just because the movie re-uses old BSG props, but because it's the best "wrong name" gag implementation in all of entertainment, ever)
      • I wonder if there's beer on the SUN...
      • Coincidentally, July 25th 1998 was the first showing of Episode 910 - The Final Sacrifice.

        Larry Csonka unavailable for comment...
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by eldavojohn ( 898314 ) *

      "We will be approaching speeds of... 3!"
      Ah, yes, a Space Mutiny quote, a very good one. I have so many favorites, perhaps I'll keep the trend going with another one from that show: "Look alive everyone ... oh, I'm sorry, not you, Susan." (in reference to a character who had died earlier in the movie but, for some reason, showed back up on the control room alive and well, working in another scene)
      • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

        "in reference to a character who had died earlier in the movie but, for some reason, showed back up on the control room alive and well, working in another scene"

        The funniest part is that it was just "in another scene", it was in the very next scene after her death. If you watch the credits, they make fun of the person responsible for Continuity.
        • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

          by eldavojohn ( 898314 ) *
          *Beef McHardSlab (hero) shoots a ray gun to ignite flammable gas into a channel that a cripple man (traitor) has taken refuge in*

          Mike: "And our brave hero roasts the disabled man!"
      • Great line, that one, but the best part of that episode had to be the names...

        Big McLargehuge!
        Pack Blowfist!
        Slab Bulkhead!
        Stump Chunkman!

        (Are the first few I remember off the top of my head)

        Never have I seen the "wrong name" gag taken to such dizzying heights of hilarity.

        OTOH, if we're just going all-time great lines:

        "Gamera's never seen a mohel" (from one of the Gamera movies, obviously, though I regret to admit I don't recall which)

        or

        Actor: "Why are you so worried about this box?"
        Mike: "Because it doesn't
      • Calgon, take me away!!

        Seriously, the one thing they DIDN'T make fun of in this one was actually the funniest part--the fact that all the "special effects" footage was stolen from Battlestar Galactica.

    • Re: (Score:2, Funny)

      by Loadmaster ( 720754 )
      Way too many. Here's one of my favorites, though.

      From: Pod People

      "Oh, man, this guy's got renaissance faire written all over him."

      (Man pulls out a crossbow from the front seat of the car)

      "Huzzah!"

      Swi
      • From: Pod People

        "Oh, man, this guy's got renaissance faire written all over him."

        (Man pulls out a crossbow from the front seat of the car)

        "Huzzah!"
        [cops depart]
        Renfair boy: [ready to poach some deer] Good. Now I can go shoot something in peace and quiet.
        Tom Servo: Do you even realize what you just said?
      • "He died as he lived... with his mouth wide open." Also, my favorite from that movie "Are we in movie A or movie B?" "I think we're in movie D, for dumb"
    • In Pod People

      Members of a really crappy rock band try to contact the outside world (from memory):

      Singer 1: "The TV's not working!"
      Singer 2: "The radio's making a funny noise, too."
      Bots: "It's called MUSIC!"

      Also, in The Atomic Brain (again, from memory):

      Housekeeper 1 (with a really bad fake European accent): "Oh, leave without me, I won't make it!"
      Housekeeper 2: "Don't talk like that!"
      Bots: "We've been saying that the WHOLE MOVIE!"
    • (After seeing asteroids floating around in space) "Honey bunches of DEATH!"
    • by isomeme ( 177414 )
      "You're full of skit."
    • by ajlitt ( 19055 )
      "Feel some malaise, suckas!"
    • Mine was from Jack Frost:

      Ivan: This is the first time I've sat on a shovel.
      Mike: Well, at least the flat end.

      It was simply the best.
    • Re: (Score:2, Funny)

      by filterban ( 916724 )
      From Master Ninja I: "I know he's around here somewhere. I can hear his theme song!" Also, from Gamera vs Megalon: "Gamera is really neat, Gamera is full of meat, we all love Gamera!"
    • by LMacG ( 118321 )
      Sample my fist you community theater reject!
    • Who is this gentle stranger with pecs like melons and knees of fringe?
    • The one that sticks to me:

      Puuuuuma-maaaaan... when will he find love? [riverblue.com]

      Classic.

    • From Episode 907 - Hobgoblins

      As "music" from soundtrack plays: Note note note note note note other note
    • by nege ( 263655 )
      Contestant number 3 slipped and her head fell off!

      Special effects by Industrial Light and Morons.

      Cmdr. Jansen: It's very perilous for everyone on board... we do not make wild accusations... so we keep this Top Classified Secret.
      Servo [as Cmdr. Jansen]: Top Super-Duper Maxi-Extreme Ultra Secret.
    • by noewun ( 591275 )

      When skewering a black and white short called At The Circus:

      "Oh my God, they're doing it clown style!

    • Re: (Score:3, Informative)

      by jollyreaper ( 513215 )

      What's everyone's favorite line from MST3K?

      There are so many good ones, I don't know where to start. Some of the best lines just aren't anything without seeing the visuals that inspired them. Here are the ones I can think of off the top of my head:

      Thug: I got a guy, he knows all the angles!
      Crow: Name's Euclid.

      Some weird wicker coffin used by paramedics to move a body
      Crow: Oh, look, it's a picnic casket!

      From Clash of the Moons
      Winky: [after leave is cancelled for a mission] So much for that gay nightlife. Looks like I'm going to have to go ride the r

    • by aafiske ( 243836 )
      Crow, practically yelling: "No fair. You can't flashback to things we saw ten seconds ago"
    • by portnoy ( 16520 )
      Crash of the Moons:

      "Object ahead."
      "Can you be any more vague, Winkie?"

    • by EMeta ( 860558 )
      What are people's favourite episodes? I'm trying to introduce my wife to MST3K, but I remember they varied in quality significantly. Suggestions?
    • CO: Ah, Captain Manikata. Come in, please.
      Mike as the CO: I understand you're stuffed with cheese.

      Best abdominal workout I'd had in months.

    • While lampooning the short "Circus on Ice", a scene featuring...well...skaters skating around an ice rink with some incredibly cheesy-Lawrence Welk-ish-muted-trumpets-and-strings-music playing, Tom(I believe) starts singing:

      These two girls they are quite a pair
      They have come from your worst nightmare
      They will haunt you for forever,
      and so when you see pink, you're gonna think 'we're doomed.'

      They are agents of Satan...

      at which point he's mercifully cut off. Snarfed out half a beer out my nose after hearing t

    • by enjerth ( 892959 )
      "Diarrhea is like a storm raging inside you." [youtube.com] (7:20) - Tom Servo, "Santa Claus Conquers the Martians"
    • From the Home Economics short:

      "Who would her friends be?"

      Who would be her blood enemies? Would she smoke thin black cigarettes and reject the triune god? :)

      Damn, I miss MST3K!

    • by Flarg! ( 265195 )
      Tubular Boobular Joy!

      Tom: Say, fellas. There sure is a lot of skin in this movie, isn't there?

      Mike: There sure is!

      Crow: Yet, despite all the acres of flesh in this film I just can't come up with a word to describes it.

      Tom: Well, I can!

      Mike: You can?

      Tom: Why sure! (sings) It's breasticaboobical, chesticamammical pendular, globular fun!

      Mike: Fleshical orbital moundular scoopular?

      Tom: Righto! That's the one!

      Crow: Is it glutial maximal, tushital, crackular, bunular, morning 'til night?

      Tom: Well, you're

    • by elrous0 ( 869638 ) *
      My, my, my Mitchell...my, my, my GOD!
    • "I'm gonna ram my ovipositor down your throat and lay eggs in your chest!"

  • Satellite News (Score:5, Informative)

    by Psmylie ( 169236 ) * on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:01PM (#19986107) Homepage
    Satellite News is still up and running for anyone who liked MST3K. They have news on the Film Crew and Rifftrax (which is Mike Nelson and guests recording downloadable commentary tracks for various movies), as well as other things that the old Best Brains crew are up to. http://www.mst3kinfo.com/ [mst3kinfo.com]
  • MST3K without Joel isn't any MST3K at all.
    • Joel was the man. IMHO, the problem with "the new guy" is that he's too animated to make the dead-pan humor most effective.
    • Crow T. Robot: You know, at this stage in any killing spree, you really ought to turn the gun on yourself.
      Crow T. Robot, Tom Servo: [chanting] Turn it! Turn it! Turn it! Turn it!
      Joel: Hey! Hey!

      that's when he left as a character and then he hung on for another six years after that. So really, do we need another MST3K at all? I mean, we've got 11 years of it with Joel as character and/or writer. That is enough to keep my bittorrent humming for awhile.

    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by elrous0 ( 869638 ) *
      Now, now...There's plenty of room in bed for both of them.

      ...oh wait, that sounded gayer than I meant

  • by eldavojohn ( 898314 ) * <eldavojohn@noSpAM.gmail.com> on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:01PM (#19986115) Journal
    I'm going to suggest an alternate site, IGN's review of it [ign.com] which, surprisingly, gave it a 9 out of 10--so I'll have to find this. From that review:

    The basic framework of The Film Crew is simple enough; three average men have been hired by media mogul Bob Honcho and given the task of recording a commentary track for every film ever made. Naturally it's a conceit to get Mike, Kevin and Bill back to doing what they do best; tearing the film industry's lesser children to ribbons. The structure of each Film Crew release is similar to MST3k in most respects, the only main difference is the lack of commercial breaks and less interstitial sketches - which most MST3k fans never considered to be that essential anyhow. The films are divided in two sections by a "lunch break" sketch which the guys sit around, you guessed it, the lunch table. The main difference of The Film Crew is the lack of the signature character silhouettes at the bottom of the screen while the movie plays, not a huge loss overall but it does mean that they can no longer interact with the on-screen action when the verbal jokes run thin.

    A few months back on Shout!'s website, fans were asked to vote on which of the four scheduled Film Crew releases would be the first on store shelves, the winner was the 1961 clunker Hollywood After Dark. Also know as Walk The Angry Beach and The Unholy Choice, the "film" features future Golden Girls star Rue McClanahan getting down to her skivvies and shaking it for all she's worth when her acting career fails - oddly enough that's the story of the film too.
    It might also be worth mentioning the Rifftrax [rifftrax.com] effort they put together a while ago, with more info/comments on the Slashdot article [slashdot.org].
    • They even a reference to MST3K in it.
    • which most MST3k fans never considered to be that essential anyhow.

      What is this IGN guy smoking? It was the sketches that first got me watching MST3k. I remember a number of times, I'd see the sketch, then turn down the vol while I worked on catching up on my reading for my ancient greek history class. In a number of cases the movie they're forced to watch is so awful that nothing can make it interesting. That's when the sketches save the show. Try watching Manos or the one about the brain swapping wi

      • What is this IGN guy smoking? It was the sketches that first got me watching MST3k. I remember a number of times, I'd see the sketch, then turn down the vol while I worked on catching up on my reading for my ancient greek history class. In a number of cases the movie they're forced to watch is so awful that nothing can make it interesting. That's when the sketches save the show. Try watching Manos or the one about the brain swapping without the sketches and see if you think the show is still enjoyable. Hmmm come to think of it, maybe this IGN guy did watch some episodes without the sketches and has totally lost his mind.

        I first started watching MST3K when I was 12. I didn't know what the show was at first, I knew there was a show with silhouettes beneath movies and there was the stoned guy with prop robots but it took me a while to put the two together. I didn't think the sketch bits were funny at first and so quickly flipped by them. The first sketch I actually watched through was Joel's cinescope invention where you get to put binocular and telescope filters over the camera. "Now if you combine the glaucoma-vision with

  • And MST3K is... (Score:2, Informative)

    by IBBoard ( 1128019 )
    And for all those who don't have a clue what MST3K is and whether you should care:

    http://www.mst3kinfo.com/mstfaq/basics.html [mst3kinfo.com]

    (Q1 says "What is Mystery Science Theater 3000?" ;) )
    • by drhamad ( 868567 )
      OK I really want to rate this redundant. But I won't. Because somebody will whine at me. DAMN YOU /.!!!!!!!
  • Blasphemy (Score:4, Insightful)

    by realmolo ( 574068 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:06PM (#19986187)
    "and less interstitial sketches - which most MST3k fans never considered to be that essential anyhow."

    The sketches *were* essential. Some of them were great, and almost all of them were funny. Well, at least when JOEL was doing them.

    Joel was better than Mike. By a lot. People that like Mike will be the first up against the wall when the revolution comes.
    • How could we have withstood the horror that was "Attack of the Giant Leeches" if it was not for the Joel/Tom/Crow: "A Danger To Myself and Others" (The Hillbilly Song) sketch?

    • Re: (Score:2, Funny)

      by GR|MLOCK ( 203716 )
      Good news, buddy. I have a copy of Wikipedia that fell through a time portal from the future, and it lists "People that like Mike Nelson" as "The first up against the wall when the Revolution came."
    • by LMacG ( 118321 )
      Jeez, if it weren't for the host segments, I wouldn't be able to cryptically declare "Nobody gets me baby, I'm the wind" and opportune moments.
  • What crap (Score:4, Informative)

    by JimboFBX ( 1097277 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:16PM (#19986321)
    ok so the link on slashdot doesnt even go to the http://www.filmcrewonline.com/ [filmcrewonline.com] website, but rather some dude's lame blog with lame ads. Oh, and I'm not even sure they even do this anymore, since they've been busy with RiffTrax, and their official website hasn't changed in a long time. What a terrible slashvertisement by man-in-the-middle proxy (go to my website to go to the real one).
    • Who cares? We never click on the link in the article anyway, and this way you (and the three other people so far to have posted it) get free karma for posting the link that we actually do click on.
  • by SirStanley ( 95545 ) on Wednesday July 25, 2007 @02:18PM (#19986347) Homepage
    What no Joel?! He was by far superior! /troll flamebait I'm wasting karma points on this.
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      by east coast ( 590680 )
      Karma points? By saying something as foolish as that you risk your eternal soul to the fiery pits of hell. I'd not want to be you on judgement day.
    • Re: (Score:3, Funny)

      What no Joel?! He was by far superior!

      Superior??? I've heard he uses vi.

    • Re: (Score:2, Flamebait)

      by elrous0 ( 869638 ) *
      Mike is barely worthy of sitting on Joel's fart-stained theater chair.
  • Posted in 2001 on IMDB, a user noted [imdb.com]:

    I think the best way to sum it up is just to say that Mystery Science Theater 3000 would have had a field day.
    In fact, this movie was so bad they had to bring back MST3K just to make fun of it!

    Oh, and nuts to "thom walker" from the UK!!!
  • I mean the bots were aresome, they interacted with the screen and thast just brought even more fun into the show.

    Maybe someday there will be a MST3K reunion movies or movies, LOL

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